“Well what?” I question.
“Music. Stay with me, kid.”
“Oh.” I try to concentrate. “Something not too fast and not too slow. In between. No rap.”
“Got it.”
“Daniel.” I grab his arm before he leaves. “Got any pointers?”
“Dance with her like you really do want to bring her home and fuck her.”
He walks out.
His words mean nothing, because the last person I want to bring home is a girl who looks just like the one I gave up. The one who haunts me. The one whose memory is like an anchor chained to my chest.
“Ready?” Divan asks.
“No.”
“Good.” He grabs me by the arm and leads me to the back of the room. We’re shrouded in darkness as Hugo calls up the girl. I’m starting to suffocate. I don’t think I can do this. I watch as the blonde takes the stage. She looks excited. I’m about to pass out.
“Breathe, man. It’s going be fine. Just let the music steer you. Don’t think, just act.”
I would have responded, but I lost all ability to form sentences as the enormity of what I’m about to do rains down.
“Okay, ladies!” Hugo broadcasts. “We have a brand-spankin’ newbie for you tonight! So be nice to him.” He sticks out his bottom lip and all the women sayaaaawww.
Dear God.
“So! Get ready, set, wet for Jack the Stripper!”
The music starts, and my body locks up. I can’t move. I just stare straight ahead at the blonde anxiously waiting for me. She’s just sitting there on the fold out chair grooving subtly to the music. I recognize the song right away. “Dark Horse” by Katy Perry. They play it all the time. Something twists inside me as I watch her. Is that what Alana looked like when she waited and waited and I never came back? How long did she hold out hope until she realized I was truly gone? The music keeps playing, and I can see ever so slightly the girl starting to question whether I exist or not. Do I? Is Jack the Stripper real, or is he just Ryan Pierce? Looking at her now, I’d much rather be Jack. Jack never abandoned anyone he loved. Jack never hurt the one person who meant most to him in this world. Jack doesn’t have any regrets.
Divan punches me in the arm. “Go, man! Daniel looks like he is about to shit!”
I glance at Daniel standing next to the bar. He’s turning red.
I take one last look at the girl, throw all my bullshit to the side, and heed Divan’s advice. I let the music steer me. I feel the sultry rhythm flow through my body and allow it to take me.
I move.
I saunter through the crowd, keeping my focus on the girl on stage. She smiles brightly when she sees me, alleviating my anxiety,a little. The beat is seductive, so I keep my moves fluid, rolling and curving my body until I’m standing right in front of her. My stomach drops when she looks me in the eyes. But I keep going, letting the music guide me. I bop to the beat, undulating right in her face a few times over before I drop to my knees. Women scream. I position myself right between her legs. I run my hands up her thighs as if I’m worshiping her. She’s giddy in the chair. Her body vibrates as I touch her, like she’s excited, like I’m a rollercoaster she’s about to ride. Then I grab her under her ass. “Hold on,” I rasp. I’m surprised I found my voice. She hooks her arms around my neck, and I hoist her up. She wraps her legs around my waist, and I turn out to face the crowd. Then I proceed, to well, dirty dance with her right in the middle of the stage. She’s a good sport. She gets into it, rolling her hips against mine, jiving to the vibe of the music. I dip her a few times, her hair flinging all over. Then I lay her down on the floor. Okay, I’m no Divan. I can’t go at a woman like I’m trying to reach a climax on stage, but I can make her feel like I want to take her home and fuck her.Isn’t that what Daniel told me to do?So, I spread her legs and crawl on top of her. I dry fuck her slowly and rhythmically right in front of everyone, and the audience goes berserk. Ear-piercing shrieks flood the room. I guess they like it. I think the blonde does too, because she latches on to me, wrapping one of her legs around one of mine. Panting heavily. She says something, but I can’t hear her over the music, it’s way too loud. I glance up to see Divan motioning to me to hurry it along; the song will be over soon. Shit. I haul the girl up and place her back on the chair. Then I kneel in front of her again.
“Rip it,” I tell her and motion to my shirt. She lights up, then without delay rips the white tank clear in two. Then she throws it into the crowd.Well, okay then.
I pause for a few beats; I know what needs to come next. My heart is pounding so hard I think it’s bruising the inside of my chest. She bites her lip as she looks down at me. She’s already undressed me with her eyes. I take a deep breath and stand.
“Unbutton them,” I say, and she reaches up and makes quick work of my fly. I turn out to the rest of the room and dance a few seconds more, teasing the women in the crowd.Hey, if I’m going to do this, I’m going to do it right.They egg me on. I see Daniel, Divan, Logan, and Shayne watching me intently.
Here goes nothing.
I grab two fistfuls of fabric, pause for a heartbeat, and then rip my pants completely off.
It sounds like the inside of a sports arena. The cheers are deafening. The song ends, and women rush the stage. Money is being thrown at me from every direction. But I can’t move.I can’t believe what I just did. I actually went through with it.
And surprisingly, I didn’t hate it.Why didn’t I hate it?
Divan grabs my arms and tows me off the stage.