I look up at the tree, Ryan really outdidhimself. It’s decked out in classic Christmas colors; red and greenornaments with a glittery gold ribbon wrapped diagonally down it.With perfectly spaced lights and evenly distributed ornaments, heconcocted an aesthetically pleasing visual like only a masterartisan could.
Talented is too puny a word to describe hisability.
“Did something happen at dinner?”
“Dinner, no? Dinner was wonderful, it’s whathappened after dinner.” I tuck some hair behind my ears and showhim my mother’s earrings.
“Holy shit, did your father give youthose?”
“Yes, right after he threatened me.”
“Threatened you?” Ryan sits up straight; thelights from the tree casting beautiful shadows across his concernedface.
“Not physically.” I put my hand on his chest,“Easy there killer. He got me a job in the prosecutor’s office andhe basically told me if I didn’t take it, he was going to hold backmy tuition. Which means I wouldn’t be able to finish lawschool.”
“Jesus Christ, Alana.”
“I know,” I drop my head into my hand.
“What are you going to do?” Ryan’s voice isworried.
I look up at him emotionally exhausted, “I’mgoing to accept the job, finish law school and then take off withyou.”
“Really?” he says surprised.
“Yes, that’s the plan right? I just hopeyou’re prepared, because come May, my life is going to get messy.I’m not going to have any money, or a job. Or even a place to livefor that matter.”
Ryan nods his head fervently, “Yes, baby,whatever you need.” He pulls me onto his lap and wraps his armsaround me. “I’ll take care of you. I’ll always take care ofyou.”
I drop me head onto his shoulder. “You’lltake care of me,” I repeat forlornly.
“Is there a problem with me wanting to takecare of you?” Ryan asks critically.
“No, it’s just not how I pictured myliberation going.”
“Yeah, well, the best laid plans, right?”
I roll me eyes resigned, “I guess.”
“It will be okay. I have some money saved andwe have a few months to plan. Just concentrate on finishing lawschool. That’s what’s important.”
“I know, but I shouldn’t have to saddle youwith my fucked up family drama.”
“Alana, you’re not saddling me with anything.And if anyone understands fucked up family drama,” he scoffs, “it’sme. This is exactly why Vegas is so important. I don’t ever wantyou to feel like this.”
“And how am I feeling Ryan?” I look up athim, knowing he knows.
“Alone.”
“Yes, that’s exactly how I felt when I walkedinto the room, but not anymore.”
He kisses my head gently, and I snuggle intohim.
We sit in the dark for I don’t know how long,gazing at the tree. It looks like it belongs in one of Macy’sstorefront windows.
“Alana?” Ryan asks softly.
“Yeah?”