“Um, yes, I—the guest room?” I really needed Lea to be here. Right now. I was so lost, and if what I suspected was true, then she thought Lea and I were together. Likethat. I had no idea what he’d been telling his family to make her think that, and I didn’t want to be the one to blow the top off of anything.
My need to end this entire interaction without upsetting her—and having that directed atme—won out by a landslide, and I said, “Just—can you hold on for a moment? I have to—to move some things out of that room first.”
“No problem, I’ll be right here. I’m just gonna let Lea know I’m here. He’s gonna freak,” she said, already lost in her phone.
Oh, it was pathetic the lengths I would go to to avoid confrontation. Truly pathetic.
All it would take were a few words to clear things up, but instead of telling her she was mistaken, I was racing down the hall to move all my things out of my own room.
I went back and forth between Lea’s room and mine until all my possessions—except for my computer equipment, moving all of that would take too long, I could ask him to help me later—were in Lea’s room. I made up the bed with new linen for his sister. By the time it looked like I hadn’t been living in it, I was sweating bullets.
I walked calmly back to the living room, where?—
Wait. I didn’t even know her name. But I couldn’t ask her her name because shouldn’t that be something that Lea’s boyfriend knew? But she hadn’t known my name. Or…the name of Lea’s boyfriend? Imaginary boyfriend? Maybe he actually had a real partner? No, that couldn’t be.
I grabbed the hair at the nape of my neck and tugged.
How in thehelldid this day turn out like this?
“Hey, it’s all ready,” I told her. “Did you—did you want something to drink? Or eat?” A boyfriend would try to be a good host, right? Not that Lea really had much food. All I had to offer were some crackers and a cola.
Lea’s sister looked over at me and said, “No, I’m okay. Thanks so much, Beau, darling.” She stood up and grabbed her suitcase, then leaned in, cupped my cheek, and kissed it. I was blushing furiously when she pulled back to look at me with the warmest expression on her face. “Ugh, you are perfect. Perfect!” Then she was walking down the hall with her suitcase rolling behind her. When I heard the door snick shut, I sank onto the couch in total disbelief.
I curled up on one side, resting my head on my arm, and shut my eyes. This wasn’t real. It wasn’t happening.
I must have drifted off, because someone’s hand was petting over my head, light, gentle strokes through the buzzcut near my ears.
A soft, melodic voice cut through the haze. “Beau?”
Lea.
My eyes flew open to find him sitting on the coffee table in front of me.
Images of a tall woman with blond hair flashed through my mind—along with all the intense emotions that her arrival had dredged up. Panic, rising anxiety, an awful dread.
A desperate need for Lea.
Had that been a dream? A weird subconscious fantasy played out behind my eyelids? Lea’s sister, me moving all my things into Lea’s room, her thinking I was dating him?
But Lea’s next words answered that question. “Beau, why is all your stuff in my room?” His lips twitched as he kept running his thumb along the side of my head in slow, gentle strokes. “Did Judy kick you out? Because if she did, I’ll kickherout.”
I blinked at him and wondered what I’d even say. We should probably go to his room and have this conversation in private.
When I spoke, it sounded like I was being strangled. “Lea, can I t-talk to you? In private?”
He looked amused and more than a little confused, but said, “Yeah. Of course. Did Judy force you out of your room?”
“Not exactly,” I admitted.
No, she didn’t force a single thing—I was just so cowardly that I hadn’t been able to tell her the truth.
Lea stood up and held out his hand to me. I took it, letting him help me to my feet and was disappointed when he let go.
When the door was shut—I flipped the lock just in case—I stepped closer to Lea, who was looking at all my stuff I’d piled neatly in one corner.
And then I realized that he probably knew from his sister that she thought I was his boyfriend. Horror scraped down my back, anxiety swelling. Did he think I told her that? Did he think I’d said that on purpose? Oh, god, he was probably so upset with me right now. Disgusted, even.
I couldn’t look at him. I didn’t want to see it on his face, so I turned toward the window and stared at nothing, trying to make my words not shake so much. “I didn’t—I didn’t tell her anything, I didn’t even know who she was at first, but she—she just started talking about me and you and I didn’t know what was happening, I swear, Lea, I didn’t know, and I?—”