She looks very uncomfortable, and it’s not just from her ass which is, as is often the case, not making much contact with her seat. No, she’s not trying to bait me. She’s trying to say something that doesn’t come easily to her.
I press her hand reassuringly.
“Take your time.”
“You’re going to get angry at me.”
“I won’t. Promise.”
“You don’t…” She hesitates. “You don’t always follow through on your promises.”
I swallow the lump in my throat. She knows what that accusation does. She knows how important promises are to me. She may not know why I once made the oath that I would never break a promise, however long I lived. But she knows I made it.
I didn’t realize I was the one to break my promise when I told her I never wanted to see her again. I thought she’d betrayed me. But now, it’s like devastation is piling on devastation. Realizing suddenly that I broke the promise I made to myself when I was six is killing me.
“I will this time,” I manage to tell her.
She takes a few deep breaths. “Maybe Logan was right. Maybe I’m not the best detective. Do you think I am?”
“Uh.” I’m not sure what to say to that, but she doesn’t seem to be expecting an answer.
She continues, “A real detective would wait for proof. Wouldn’t he?”
“I guess so. Why?”
“Well…” She swallows with difficulty. “I guess I didn’t have any proof you killed my parents. I kind of just… assumed. And then when I saw your reaction, I assumed the opposite. Basically, just a whole lot of assumptions, I guess.”
She withdraws her hand from mine and fists it into a nervous ball in her lap.
“Piper,” I breathe, but she’s back to staring out the window. “Would it help if I told you the truth?”
“Depends on what the truth is, I guess,” she squeaks out in a strangled sort of voice.
“You assume right. I didn’t kill your parents.”
“I know that, of course,” she says nervously, her hands jittery in her lap.
“From what I’ve gathered, itwasa soldier contract,” I add, trying to keep my eyes on the road all while studying her reaction in my peripheral vision. “But I had nothing to do with it. I wasn’t even aware of the contract until after it happened. I guess you assumed all that too.”
She nods hurriedly.
“Does that reassure you?”
“Yes. No. I mean…” She blushes painfully, wringing her hands. “I knew all that. I knew you didn’t kill my parents.”
I frown in confusion. “Okay, so…”
“I think,” she breathes, “I was trying to warm up to… to the other thing.”
“Oh.”
I turn my attention fully back to the road, suddenly realizing she’s referring to the rape. This is the moment she’s chosen for confiding in me about it.
And it’s the worst fucking moment. Because I’m not ready.
There’s a long silence during which my stomach feels like it’s slowly turning into solid lead. “Piper,” I say at last. “I don’t… I don’t think we should talk about that right now.”
She looks up at me in surprise. “You… don’t?”