He laughs. “I both love and hate that you can’t ever take meseriously.”
“You take yourself seriously enough for the both of us. Is she in your head now? Maggie gets to call the shots?”
“No.” He finally looks at me, and I give him my most reassuring smile.
“We’re friends, okay?”
“Okay.” His sigh is filled with relief. I’ve never met anyone who enjoys the status quo more than Liam, and I’ve brought us gently back to that place where we can let it go and move on. It’s a nanny skill, and I think he knows it. Still works, though.
The man is dying to be my friend and only my friend without the possibility of more. So, that’s what we’ll do. It’s a good reminder to keep my expectations in check. And speaking of, I should probably check in with Mr. Emoji.
It’s a bad sign that I can’t remember his real name. Is it Troy? Cray? Gray?
I silenced notifications from him, which is also probably not a good sign. Who am I kidding? I have no expectations for tomorrow. None. It’s not Mr. Emoji I’m fantasizing about when my mind wanders. I shouldn’t have put that as his contact name. It takes a little bit of scrolling through messages to find where he first introduced himself. Trey. His name is Trey Marcum. That’s a nice name, actually.
I go to change the contact details and hover over the edit button. His nickname sparks joy, and I’ll take all of that I can get. If Mr. Emoji gets past a first date, I’ll change it.
Chapter 14 – Start Here
Liam
I’m convinced Andrew could excel at just about any career. Well, any career that doesn’t involve handing out compliments. He has Rosalie’s car up and running in no time, and she looks the most grateful I’ve ever seen her.
Grateful to get away from me, if I’m reading her body language right. We keep reiterating that we’re friends, but she’s afraid to get within three feet of me. That’s on me. I’m confusing her, and it’s the last thing I want.
Every time I think I can be indifferent to her if I just try a little harder, the universe sends me a reminder that I’m still a guy. The last thing I overhear before Rosalie leaves is her telling Marisol that she’s headed home to take a bubble bath and read a book.
I have a trick for clearing my mind when I’m overwhelmed. I recite the Harry Potter books in order. And then I recite them backwards. Next, I go through the Narnia series, in publicationand then reading order. I’m getting good. I’m reciting them as she’s driving away from us.
Since Rosalie didn’t take any leftovers except a piece of cake for the road, Marisol loads me up. I can see questions in her eyes, but she won’t ask me in front of the kids.
I don’t have answers for her. I don’t have answers for me. I have no idea what I want to do about the situation. I do know talking to Rosalie is fun. The old guy behind the counter at O’Reilly’s adored her on sight. She left knowing all about his three grandkids and his wife’s secret chicken Alfredo recipe. He assumed we were together, and neither of us corrected him. Staying quiet was an easy call. I would have gotten an impertinent “why not?” and as stated, I don’t know why not.
Okay, I do know why not. I have a whole list of why-nots that start with my kids, my life, being her boss and not messing that up, and then there’s me. Relationships don’t work when I’m one-half of the equation. Even Esther moved on and figured things out. But not me. I’m still stuck.
I can put on a good front. I can do or say the right things while I’m dating someone, but eventually the front just isn’t enough. Rosalie deserves more than that. How did Maggie describe me? Oh yeah, nice and completely closed off. I’m a total catch.
We listen to an audiobook on the way home, and both kids stay awake, a small miracle. That means they’re ready for bedtime with minimal prodding once we go inside. A power nap would have energized them for hours.
“Did you like dinner?” I ask Callie when I’m tucking her into bed. It didn’t seem like she ate all that much, but normally she begs for a snack, and she didn’t this time.
She touches noses with her ratty stuffed giraffe and then looks up at me. “I liked the carrot curls and the soup. Auntie Marisol already asked me so many questions. But then she gave me a second piece of cake, so I didn’t mind so much. Can we have waffles for breakfast?”
“Sure, kid.”
She yawns and reaches up for a hug. Her little hands are cold on my neck. “Is Ro’s car okay?”
“Yes. It’s invincible.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means her car is super healthy now that it has a new battery.”
“Oh, good. That means she can go to the movies with us tomorrow. Bea says there’s a dinosaur movie, and Ro really likes dinosaurs. Her favorite is the… I can’t remember.”
I’m not sure if she’s talking about a kids movie with a friendly talking dinosaur, or a movie where the dinosaurs eat greedy corporate hacks who wander into the jungle, but either way, I’d rather not.
“Ro has plans tomorrow. What about the library?”