“She does.” Early stared at Connor’s mug. “He left me the ranch. Three hundred acres plus the BLM lease for the mustang project. A five thousand square foot house, a guest house, a foreman’s house, fishing pond, two horse barns, feed barn, tool shed…”
“It’s a lot.” Connor let the words just hang between them for a Mommaent and took a sip of his coffee. It was a lot. A huge ranch and tons of land, the Bureau of Land Management lease, the livestock, other houses…it was overwhelming, in fact. He couldn’t get his head around it. “It’s a lot to…think about.”
“Yeah. I don’t know how to even start.” Connor had no doubt that Early was telling the truth. Those eyes were wide and shocked and stunned.
He took a deep breath, set his coffee down and stepped closer to Early, trying to pull his gaze, get his attention. “Hey. What do you need from me?”
“I don’t know. I don’t even know how to figure that out. I thought I was coming to bury my uncle, not…this.”
“Okay.” Early needed some time to process this and the burial and everything else. They both did. “So, I’m just going to say this. I love you. And whatever comes next, we’re going to figure it out together. Okay?” He didn’t know what that meant, or where the compromise was yet, but there had to be one. He and Early were partners. “We’re a team, right?”
“Yes. We’re more than a team. We’re a family.” Early came to sit next to him. “I’m just shocked. Maybe someone should have mentioned it before now.”
Someone should have. Perhaps Rick should have while he was still of sound mind. But it didn’t seem like Demming had known either, so Rick had kept those cards close for some reason. “Probably they should have, but they didn’t. I’m sure everyone felt they were doing the right thing, and given that they have all deserted us here alone after delivering the news, they obviously understand the situation it’s put us in.”
“Yeah. Yeah. Fuck…” Early stood and started pacing, quick, staccato steps that screamed worry.
He let Early pace for a minute or so, watching to see if it was helping. It wasn’t. “Talk, honey. Off the top of your head, just say what’s on your mind.” As if he didn’t know. As if he didn’t have the same worries. But Early seemed like he might explode if he didn’t let some of it out.
“I’m scared.” The words burst out, as bald and raw as he’d ever heard, barring that first, “I love you,” and, “I want kids.”
He barely resisted the urge to hop up and put his arms around Early. It was hard to get his cowboy talking, and he needed to listen. “What scares you most?”
“Losing? Making bad decisions? Doing something stupid?” He tugged at his short, short hair. “Doing something I’ll regret?”
“We’re not going to sell it.” He said that softly, trying to bring the energy down a little. “I promise.”
“No? It’s… I don’t have words for what it is to me, what it means.”
“You don’t need words, Early. I can see it. I can feel it. I listen, honey. I know.”
“So what? What do we do? How do we even begin to do this? The boys have to be back at school. You have to be back to work. I ha—There’s so much to do.”
“I don’t know yet. We have a little time to think about it, right? It’s not like Rick has been helping with the ranch lately. Demming is okay for a minute.” He thought he did know though; he just didn’t like the answer.
“Yeah. Yeah, I’ll have to have a meeting with Demming, ask him where we are, what the money situation is.” Early shook his head and sighed. “Christ, what a mindfuck.”
He got up and slipped his arms around Early’s waist. “We’ll figure it out. There will be no bad decisions; you won’t lose anything. There has to be a solution. We’re smart, we’ll find it.”
He really hoped all of that was true. They’d make it true somehow, they had to. But it was what Early needed to hear right now.
Early leaned into him. “Damn, honey. I do love you. I’m so sorry about this craziness.”
“Your family does know how to bring it, huh?” Connor chuckled softly. The boys were their own kind of chaos, but that was usually more…manageable. “It’s kind of exhausting.”
“It’s maddening, but they’re mine, right?” Early straightened up. “And I love them…usually.”
“I know. Seems like they usually love you too.” He hugged Early tight. “Feel better?”
“I feel shocked, but I’m not sure there’s any way around that.”
“Nope. There isn’t. I think you should help your dad finish with the arrangements for Rick and put this aside until after the burial. For now, just trust that we’ll figure it out. One thing at a time. We’re here for a week.” At least. He had a feeling Early would be here longer, but he was going to take his own advice and think about that later.
“Right. Let’s get Uncle Rick settled, and the rest I can deal with in a bit.” Early squeezed his fingers. “I don’t like feeling this much, darlin’.”
He hummed happily. He loved when Early called him darling. “I know.” There was a time when big feelings had made Early go out to the garage and destroy something. Or burn something in the backyard. Anything but talk about it. He’d come by it honestly—noting that neither of his parents stuck around to talk about this. He’d come a long way. “You just inherited a ranch you’ve loved since you were a boy. It’s a good thing. Above everything else, it’s a good thing, honey.”
Hopefully.