Beck sighed. “Sorry, Sky.”
He shook his head. No. No, he wasn’t going to lose his one chance to see Beck again.Please. Doc. Doc, take it off. Take the motherfucking thing off!
“Sky. Skyler.” Hands caught his head to keep it still. “You’re not going to get what you want that way. You need to calm the hell down before you make things worse. Calm down and we’ll try again.”
Beck. Beck, honey. Please. I need to see you.He sucked in a deep breath, forcing himself to chill the fuck out.
“Deep breath and he didn’t pass out. Also good. Eyes closed, and we’ll try one more time. But if it hurts, Sky, don’t risk—” Doc snorted. “Listen to me telling you not to take a risk. Just don’t be stupid, son.”
The bandage was removed again.
He breathed again, and the light beating on his eyelids eased up.Oh, good. Good.He looked up, searching for Beck’s eyes.Please, God. I suck as a Christian, as a lover, and as a friend, but I’m a fair-to-middling man. Let me see him.
“Beckett.”
“Coming.”
There was some shuffling in the room, and then a dark figure moved into view. He blinked, trying to clear his vision and focus.
“Hi, Stud.”
He must really be dying. ItwasBeck.
Beck stayed there, silently staring into him. Even with the weird fuzzy focus, he could see Beck’s expression changing from a smile, to worry, to something else…something sad. Eventually Beck sighed and rested their foreheads together.
Skyler sucked in a breath, and it was Beck-scented, and this was good-bye. Beck was here to say good-bye, and he couldn’t bear it, but he had to because it was Beck. Tears began to burn his eye, and suddenly he couldn’t breathe from missing the stupid, stubborn, beautiful son of a bitch.
Beck sniffed and rubbed at both eyes. “Sorry. I’m…sorry. It’s…we have a lot to say, huh?”
All the things. Please, stay. Please. Stay a little longer. God, I remember how you smell. I thought I’d forgotten. I found your shirt in my go-bag and slept with it for months, but it stopped smelling right.
“Doc told me you can do this, Sky. I believe him. You’re going to come back home with me when you can, okay? So…you get yourself out of here, and I’ll figure out the rest.”
Skyler stopped, focusing on Beck’s eyes. If it was a dream, it was the best dream.
Beck smiled, but it didn’t quite light up those brown eyes the way it should. “You’re going to tire out fast. I promised Parker I’d get him in here if you—when you woke up. I’m…I’m not leaving. I…let me get him.”
Just like that, Beck left the room.
He closed his eyes, letting himself retreat back into the quiet stillness that didn’t hurt. The logical part of his brain said he was pure-D fucked if Beck could lie and say there was a place for Skyler, but the stupid part kept that idea and wrapped it up close.
“He came as soon as Parker called him. Got right in his car and drove down here.” Doc stepped closer and touched his fingers. “It’s hard when you’re not someone who’s used to just having faith.”
He hooked one finger around Doc’s and squeezed. Then he sighed, remembering to give thanks for the answer to his prayer. If this was it, it was more than he expected, more than he deserved.
5
“Be careful what you wish for, Beckett.”
The last real conversation Beckett had about Skyler was a year ago, and he’d forgotten about it until the night after Skyler’s first surgery—the one they’d done to replace the hip and set Sky’s fractured femur.
It came back to him in his sleep, waking him in the middle of the night like some kind of karmic “I told you so.”
He woke up in his dark hotel room, heart pounding and stomach churning with a kind of guilt and horror he’d never felt before.
He’d been drinking, he remembered that, and he’d had his finger hovering over Sky’s cell number for an hour before Adam showed up.
“Go ahead and call him.”