How the fuck she could drop a line like that and just walk away as though she hadn’t just completely fried my brain was beyond me.
I was used to being in control in all aspects of my life. I wasn’t sure what that said about me, but it’d been true since I was a kid. As I got older, I quickly realized my control didn’t just extend to my day-to-day, but to every part of my life. It wasthe one aspect of Sarah’s and my relationship that we actually seemed compatible.
Occasionally, she’d want to change it up and take charge. I tried to indulge her, but I couldn’t get out of my head. It always felt wrong. Now, I wondered if it really was just a case of two people who weren’t properly suited for one another, because if Olivia had ordered me to follow her into that bathtub, then I would’ve gone like a dog on a leash.
The girls showered and changed quickly, barrelling into the living room before I’d had a chance to boil water for the pasta, so I decided to enlist their help. Harper was used to being my helper during dinner, but Charlie seemed lost. She admitted she could bake a mean cookie, but she didn’t know the first thing about cooking a meal.
As we put the finishing touches on dinner, I reminded them to pick a movie while I checked in on Olivia. They gladly agreed, running for the remote without another word.
My bare feet padded against the hardwood floor as I made my way to the master suite. The door was cracked open. I rapped my knuckles against the frame, hearing a soft, “Come in,” from the other side.
I blew out a breath before pushing it open and looking around. The room was tidy, but looked inherently lived in. When he built the place, Lukas was adamant about adding minimalistic touches everywhere so it felt cozy enough to stay for a few days without making anyone feel too at home.
Olivia didn’t seem to get the message.
Her clothes were all over the place, strewn haphazardly along the floor and the reading chair in the corner. The bedding had been replaced, going from a soft cream to a sage green. Small picture frames were placed on her nightstand and the dresser against the far wall. Most of them were of Charliegrowing up, but the two that weren’t immediately caught my eye.
The first was of Grady’s wedding. Olivia was standing at his side with Cleo on the other. Charlie stood between them. All of them were wearing the biggest smiles I’d ever seen. That was what true happiness looked like.
It was the second that gave me pause. Three people posed in front of a lake. It was nearly dusk, the sky in the background a faded pink hue. I remembered when it was taken, but I’d never actually seen the picture itself.
Lukas and I were holding a newly graduated Olivia between us, preparing to toss her off the dock and into the frigid water below. All three of us had just graduated from school, so we’d decided to camp at the lake to celebrate. John rented some ridiculous house he called a cabin, even though there were something like six bedrooms to choose from.
On our final night, John begged to get one single photograph to commemorate our time together before we all went our separate ways. Olivia, the darling she was, had immediately stepped between us and smiled. Her brother and I had other ideas.
We each bent down and grabbed one of her legs, dangling her dangerously close to the water. John snapped the picture right before we tossed her in, all of us with our heads thrown back in laughter.
God, everything seemed so much simpler back then. There were no rules, minimal expectations. We had our whole lives to look forward to. While Lukas and Olivia dreamed of creating big, exciting futures for themselves, I’d wanted to take a simpler approach.
I wanted to find a good job—maybe open my own business one day. I wanted to get married, have kids, and do all the boring, mundane shit together as a family. And for a while, I’dmade those dreams a reality until they all came crashing down.
My life now looked so different from what I’d imagined. It was hard not to mourn what could have been. Regret had followed me around for years, even after I married Sarah. I should have done more, dreamed bigger, loved harder.
But I didn’t.
Regrets are for fools.
I could hear John’s words clearly. Only a fool would waste what little time he was given lamenting on the past. But it was hard not to sometimes. Especially when I looked at my daughter and wished I could give her so much more than I was able to.
“Duke?” My head snapped toward the cracked bathroom door at the sound of Olivia’s voice. “Is that you?”
“Y-Yeah,” I stammered, clearing my head. “It’s me. I wanted to let you know dinner’s ready.”
“Perfect timing.” I heard the sound of the stopper popping free and water draining. “I’ll be out in five.”
“Sounds good,” I called, taking a step back from our photo.
I turned to head back into the living room, but stopped short as I realized there was a perfect line of sight into the bathroom from where I was standing. The lighting was dim. I could see the flicker of candlelight along the wall, interrupted only by a shadow. The silhouette of a woman rising from the bath.
I should stop.
I should look away.
I should leave.
But I couldn’t. Not when Olivia stepped into view, giving me a perfect view of her exposed back. Rivulets of water ran down her curves, settling into the dimples just above her ass.
She moved the towel gently along her body, starting at her neck and working her way down. Her hand came up, kneading the tense muscles along her shoulders. My gaze traveled downthe length of her. I was entranced, wishing I could step through the door and take care of her myself, but knowing it would cross too many lines if I did. Lines I wasn’t sure either of us should be thinking about crossing in the first place.