Tears burn my eyes at the sight. At how quickly and easily he moved on from me. And then he says the words that absolutely destroy me.
“I love you, Amora.”
All the oxygen is yanked from my lungs. The world tilts, and it feels like I’m about to be hurled from the earth itself. Everything we were—everything we had—vanishes in an instant.
And I realize this must be what he felt when I rejected our bond.
I never thought about it before now. Never let myself imagine the depth of his pain. But I do now.
Slowly, the images begin to fade—he way they looked at each other as if they were each other’s entire world. The desire bouncing back and forth between them. The lingering taste of blood on my lips.
The scent is the last to leave me. It clings to the air, heavy and unforgettable. Sex and love and lust all mix together in a musky sweet scent. One that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.
At last, the darkness of the room I fell asleep in pulls me under again, back to the safety of my room.
I can see Brax and Riven sitting in the chairs, watching me and waiting for an attack. They don’t realize that the attack happened while I was asleep.
I scream, unable to contain my grief for another second. The walls cave in around me, and the tears cascade like waterfalls down my cheeks.
“Lumi!”I hear Ambrose scream through our bond. A second later, his arms are around me. “What’s wrong?”
I can’t speak. Can’t think.
Thankfully, I don’t have to. He sees it all through the bond.
“Out,” he shouts to Brax and Riven.
They both hesitate.
“Get the fuck out!” Ambrose shouts again, protectively.
“She shouldn’t be left alone,” Brax says.
“Guard the door. But she needs to be alone right now. She needs as few people as necessary to watch her heart breaking,” he says.
I don’t know if they leave. I don’t know how the world shifts. I don’t know what happens next. But I know that Ambrose is here. I feel him everywhere and nowhere. As if he’s trying to comfort me by giving me the space to grieve alone.
Let him go; the pain will ease if you let him go. If you hate him.
I know that it’s true. That if I hate Nyx, the pain will ease. It’s the best thing to do not only for myself but for the world. I was never meant to love Nyx. To be his mate. It was always temporary.
But I don’t want to stop the pain. I don’t want to forget. Because what he did, it doesn’t make me hate him. I’m not sure anything he could ever do would make me hate him.
I fell out of love with Ambrose the moment he betrayed me. But what I feel for Nyx goes beyond anything I can control. It’s buried deep, carved into the very marrow of my soul, and I know I’ll love that man until the day I die, probably longer. Even when I shouldn’t. Even when I’ve fallen in love with someone else. Even when my love will destroy me.
Chapter 13
Lumi
Ambrose’s arms wrap around me, and for once, I don’t protest. I don’t tell him to let me go. I don’t tell him I’m fine on my own. I don’t shut him out.
I lean into his strong arms, letting them envelope me alongside his magic. I can feel it buzzing beneath his skin, wrapping around us like a warm blanket. I need that too—the protection, the comfort that is so different from what Nyx gives me.
For a moment, I let myself think about the differences between the two men. So similar and yet so different. Both protective. Both love me fiercely. Both would go to the end of the world for me. But both of them would go about it so differently.
It can’t be true. My dream was just a nightmare. It didn’t really happen. It was a product of my imagination running away from me. I know Nyx is trying to push me away in the same way that Ambrose is trying to get me to fall in love with him. He saw a chance, and he took it. I’m sure he spent a lovely evening with Amora. Spent the evening catching up with his childhood crush. But that’s all that happened. Even though he’ll try to make me feel like his once-in-a-lifetime love, the one who got away has returned to him. I don’t believe it.
“We don’t have to get up, not yet. Everyone is safe. The witches haven’t shown up. No enemy vampires are here. My curse hasn’t tried to end your life. You’re safe here,”Ambrose whispers in my mind.