“Bad day, huh?”
“Oh yeah. Everything that could go wrong, has gone wrong. You ever get those days?” A pause. Cathy looks Suzie up and down, taking in her polished hair and careful makeup, the simple gold jewelry Suzie chooses because it is quiet and tasteful. “Okay, maybeyoudon’t.”
“Here.” Suzie takes the coffee out of the cardboard tray and passes it to Cathy. “Have this. It’s Teddy’s but he won’t mind. He shouldn’t have too much caffeine anyway, it’s bad for his blood pressure.”
Cathy nods gratefully and takes a sip. “Wow, that’s strong!”
“Oh yeah. Four shots. Bad for his heart too, I should think. I’m doing him a favor, really.”
“This is really kind of you. Thank you. I’m not normally like this.” Cathy draws a long, shuddering breath, composing herself.
Suzie pats her gently on the hand. “On my worst days I like to break things,” she says conspiratorially, pleased when Cathy laughs with disbelief. “It’s true! I have a stack of old plates in the shed. I pick them up from car boot sales and charity shops. Ugly old things,all chipped and broken. Some days I like to hurl them against the wall just as hard as I can.”
“You should take up kickboxing.”
“Teddy says he’s going to build me a punchbag. I don’t even think he’s kidding!”
Both women laugh.
“Do you mind if I smoke?” Cathy asks.
Suzie shakes her head. “Go right ahead.”
Cathy lights her cigarette with some pleasure, looking out toward the paved precinct, where a group of skateboarders are trying to grind the handrails.
“Your oldest is about that age now, isn’t he?” Suzie asks.
Cathy laughs and points her cigarette. “Thatismy oldest. Danny. The one with his pants round his knees and his cap on backward like he’s something special. Don’t worry, he won’t talk to me out here where his friends can see. He’s mad as hell at the world these days. I just let him go on and get it out of his system. Like you and your plates.”
“And who’s this sleepy little guy?” Suzie leans round and peers at the toddler.
“That’s Scout. My youngest and last. I’m done now, thank God. He’s good as gold but I’m tired.”
“Teddy says we can think about babies soon as he gets his promotion.” Suzie twists her wedding band. “I think he’d like two boys too.”
“What about you?”
“Hmm?”
“Well, what would you like? You’re growing them. You’re carrying them around for nine months and feeding them and putting cream on your cracked nipples. What doyouwant?”
Suzie blinks. It surprises her to discover that she hasn’t even considered what she wants.How strange, she thinks.
“Anyway”—Cathy exhales a jet of violet smoke, fanning it away from the pram—“here’s the thing with siblings—no matter what you do, sometimes they just don’t fit together. It comes as a surprise to some people, I think, that two people related by blood and brought up closely together can be so different.”
“Are your boys like that?”
“Too soon to say. This one”—she points her cigarette toward the sleeping toddler—“adores Danny. But Danny’s hitting that age, isn’t he? Fifteen. He doesn’t want to be tied to his baby brother and his tired old mum. He wants to be with his friends. He’s a good kid, it’s just hard. You’ve got a whole bunch of brothers, right, Suzie?”
“Three. All in the armed forces.”
“You get along with them?”
“They look out for me. Protective. I always feel small in their company. Like a baby bird.”
“That’s nice. I’d have liked brothers.”
“You had Hazel.”