Colin had no idea what he was talking about, but just then the pool came into view. The club sat on a promontory overlooking the lake, and the pool was down one step. Beyond that were tennis courts, and farther out spread the golf course.
The pool sparkled impossibly blue and green and clear. The laughter of children drifted in the hot, still air. He thought it looked like a liquid jewel.
Arnold pointed to a smaller building beyond the tennis courts. “That’s the pro shop. When you’re done, go and sit there. If you need me, speak to anybody and they’ll come find me. We’ll drive back together. Unless you’d rather walk back—”
“No. I’ll wait.”
“Fine. Good.” Arnold studied Colin a long moment, then said, “Something’s bothering you.”
Colin saw the concern in those dark eyes. He thought back on the first time they had met, the cold hostility, the way Arnold wanted to dismiss him as a waste of time. “Thank you. For everything.”
“You’re worried about tonight’s dinner with your father and his new family.”
He nodded. The day dimmed slightly. But not because of the visit. Not really. Because he had lied to his friend. It was wrong. He knew it was. But he didn’t know any other way to move forward. What he was planning, he knew Arnold and all the other adults would think him crazy. They would insert themselves into the process. But Colin had spent the last four months analyzing. Observing. Knowing what his father intended. His only hope, small as it was, came from …
“Colin, do you want me to go with you?”
“No.”
“Or Celeste. She could—”
“No.” He said it overloud, the word forced out with his fear and tension. He said it softer. “No. I’ll be okay.”
The pool enclosure was full of conflicting impressions. The negative was so intense it almost drove him away. If he had not felt such a strong draw to enter the crystal waters, he would never have made it past the dressing rooms. The otherchildren shouted and laughed, the words so strange it sounded to him like a foreign language. He was amazed at how easy they felt, how they formed a tight unit that constantly exploded in noise and movement. He undressed very slowly, marking how the others fit everything into small lockers and took the key and pinned it to their trunks. He waited until most of the others left, then finished undressing and slipped on the swimming trunks. The cloth was stiff and strange feeling. The sandals were very odd as well, with a single thong inserted between his big and second toes. None of it was unpleasant. Just new.
He took his towel and goggles and entered the light.
A trio of clocks stood on tall metal poles. The swim class was not scheduled to begin for another fifteen minutes. All the other children raced to the pool’s edge and jumped into the shallow end. Colin seated himself on the edge of a chaise lounge and studied the situation. He knew a large part of his discomfort came from how he hated the way his body looked. His skin was pasty white. The excess flab created ugly little dimples and folds, which he could see just by dropping his chin. The skin on his legs looked like Camila’s bread dough before she slid the rack into the baking oven.
But it was more than that.
Colin was used to being the outsider. The superfreak. But this was different. He was entering the outside world. On his own. For the very first time. Without the protection of people he could trust. And what he felt was the same distance that had always separated him. In his family. At the school. In Sojourn House. Which meant … what? That he was carrying this distance with him? That he was going to stay alone and isolated all his life?
“Hi there. Are you Colin?”
He turned and looked up, but it wasn’t possible to see more than her silhouette because she stood with the sun directly behind her. He nodded.
She lowered herself onto the chaise lounge beside him. “Hi, Colin. I’m Mira Brooks.”
She was beautiful.
Colin had seen attractive girls before. Any number of the Outer Banks Academy students were attractive. And rich. But this girl was …
“I understand this is your first time at a pool, which is wild. How old are you?”
“Twelve.”
“Amazing.” She was sixteen or seventeen and tanned a uniform bronze, almost toffee colored. She wore a red one-piece bathing suit with a white cross by her left shoulder. Encircling the cross was the lettering, “Landfall Country Club Certified Lifeguard.” Her hair was bundled up tight under a red swim cap, but one dark strand had escaped and fell by her right ear. “I can’t remember my first time in a pool. My mom says I was born with flippers. Are you scared, Colin?”
“No.”
“Because if you are, I’m here to tell you, you’ll be totally safe. That’s my job. To teach you how to swim, and keep you safe. And I am very very good at my job.”
“I’m not scared.”
She had eyes almost as dark as her hair, only the sunlight revealed a deep coloring, like a second shade hidden beneath the black surface. He had never seen eyes like hers. “Then how is it you’ve made it all the way to twelve and you’ve never been at a swimming pool?”
“I’ve lived at Outer Banks Academy since I was six. They don’t have a pool.”