I won’t.
It’s not that the past twelve months haven’t been good. Occasionally evengreat. Geneva is a gorgeous city full of history, culture, international business, art… and, most unexpectedly, love. Working with Vincent and Blair at VALENT, for the first time in my life I’ve actually felt like I’m earning their affection. They’ve paid me more attention in the past year than in the eighteen that came before. Combined.
But as good as things are, as happy as I tell myself I am… in the back of my mind, a stubborn little voice nags at me — wondering how I found myself so far from home, so far from everything I thought I wanted; whispering in the small hours of the night that this new life isn’t one I would’ve chosen for myself, given the chance.
What about college?
What about fashion design?
What about your big dreams to start your own label someday?
Left unanswered, those questions have grown from a subdued buzz to a screaming roar that wakes me, gasping, out of sound sleep. The sudden claustrophobia of my circumstances has begun to weigh on me so heavily, some days it’s difficult to breathe. To laugh. To do anything at all, except go through the motions like a robot on autopilot.
I need a break from it all — the board meetings and family dinners, the crushing weight of expectation on my shoulders. I need some space to sort out my own desires without thinking about what anyone else wants for me, and from me.
Not my parents.
Not the VALENT board of directors.
Not Oliver.
As if he’s heard my thoughts, my cellphone begins to buzz in the depths of my clutch bag. I pull it out, staring at the name OLIVER BEAUFORT flashing over his picture on my screen — sandy blond hair, dark blue eyes, well-groomed beard. For a moment, I contemplate letting him ring through to voicemail.
He’ll worry if you don’t answer,I chide myself, connecting the call with a terse finger-tap.Don’t be selfish, Jo.
“Hi.”
“Hey, darlin.’” His warm, faintly accented voice blasts into my ear canal. “Home safe, then?”
“Standing in my kitchen as we speak.”
“How was the flight?”
“Long. Uneventful.” I lean back against the edge of the countertop. “I slept almost the entire way.”
“I still wish you’d taken the jet. Absolute nonsense to fly commercial like a commoner when your parents own a Gulfstream, if you ask me.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose. “I don’t want to fight about this again, Ollie.”
“Fine, fine.” He sighs deeply, no doubt remembering the massive row we got into about this very topic before my departure. “I won’t open a can of worms. I only want the best for you.”
“I know you do.”
“You sound tired, darlin.’” He pauses. “Are you sure you’re all right?”
“Of course. It’s just… being home after all this time away. It’s an adjustment.”
“I bet. Everything as you remember?”
“A bit dustier, but I’ll manage.”
“I thought you had staff on the property to deal with the upkeep?”
“We used to. They’re…” I struggle to keep my voice steady as Flora and Miguel’s faces flash inside my mind. “They’re gone. They left.”
“I didn’t realize that. I don’t like the thought of you being there all alone.”
“I have a state-of-the-art security system, Ollie. That’s all I need.”