“Miss Josephine Valentine, Exeter Academy of Excellence Class Valedictorian, doesn’t know what to do? I find that slightly alarming. You always seemed like you had your whole life figured out.”
“Guess I fooled you then. I’m just as much of a mess as anyone, I assure you. Probably more of a mess, in fact. Everyone else in our graduating class is out there chasing their dreams, making names for themselves… and here I am, right back where I started, unsure of everything.” A note of bitterness creeps into my tone as Archer’s face flashes behind my eyes. “But I guess we can’t all be star pitchers who skyrocket off into the sunset, huh?”
Chris doesn’t respond to my — I must admit — rather cheap shot. That shouldn’t surprise me. He and Archer were always friendly during their days on the varsity baseball team. For all I know, they’re still friendly.
Just because Archer Reyes left me in the dust when he blew out of this town, doesn’t necessarily mean he did the same to everyone else.
The silence between Chris and me drags on, broken only when he coughs uncomfortably. Shifting his weight from one foot to the other, suddenly he can’t quite meet my eyes. I struggle to interpret the look on his face — a mix of skepticism and… Could it be sadness? Perhaps I was wrong about them keeping in touch.
“Look, Valentine,” Chris says haltingly. “About Reyes—”
“I don’t want to know.”
His brows lift. “What?”
“I don’t want to know how he’s doing, Chris. I don’t want to hear how great his life is, or which MLB teams are recruiting him, or how high his star has risen. I don’t want to hear any of it. I can’t.” My words come out in a choked voice that sounds nothing like my own. Behind my eyes, the pressure of impending tears is growing stronger by the second. I take a deep breath, desperately trying to keep it together. “Frankly, after last summer… let’s just say, Archer made it crystal clear he doesn’t consider me privy to the intimate details of his life. I think we should keep it that way.”
Chris’ eyes are rounder than the buggy headlights on the Porsche. His face has gone pale beneath the blazing midday sun.
Great job, Jo. You’ve gone and made the boy uncomfortable with your emotional meltdown.
“So, you…” The Adam’s apple bobs in Chris’ throat as he swallows sharply. His wide eyes are riveted on my face. “You don’t know, then. About—”
I cut him off. “How would I know anything about him?” A cynical smile twists my lips — somewhat undermined by the tears now leaking down my face. “We don’t talk anymore.”
It’s the truth.
The painful, excruciating, unfortunate truth.
It’s not exclusively Archer’s fault. Excommunication is a two-way street. He might’ve been the one to walk away, but I’m the one who bolted the door shut behind him. Not just him — everyone from Exeter Academy. It was easier that way. Easier to throw my whole former life out the window than risk seeing Archer’s face in the background of some snapshot on Facebook, or tagged in a video on Instagram by a loose acquaintance I forgot to unfollow.
It was shockingly easy to erase all traces of Josephine Valentine from cyberspace. A few minutes, a few finger taps on a smartphone screen. By the time the VALENT jet wheels hit the tarmac in Switzerland last summer, I’d scrubbed my social media presence completely.
A drastic measure?
Perhaps.
But in my eyes, also a necessary one.
I know myself too well. Given the ability, it would only be a matter of time until I caved to the impulse to internet-stalk Archer via our mutual acquaintances, or poured pathetically over old posts featuring our once-smiling faces. It was better to remove the temptation; to stop all association cold-turkey, like an addict entering rehab. Sure, the detox was a painful one. But in a foreign country with a new phone and an unlisted number, there was zero possibility of reaching out to anyone for an update on the great Archer Reyes.
“Look, Valentine…” Chris rubs the back of his neck, looking deeply unsettled. “It’s not really my place to say anything about this, but I think…”
“No, no! Seriously, don’t worry about it. I’m fine. I swear.” I brush the wetness from my cheeks. Mortification churns through my bloodstream. I can’t believe I’m crying in front of him. “It’s been great catching up with you, Chris. Really. But I need to get back on the road if I’m going to make it to Brown in time for my appointment.”
“Right,” he murmurs.
He’s still staring at me with that strange look. It leaves me unsettled. I feel like I’m missing something. Confusion and curiosity rise up inside me in a swift tide. The urge to ask what’s going on with Archer is so strong, it nearly knocks the wind out of my lungs. I bite my lip to physically contain the words as I reach for the ignition key.
“See you around, Chris.”
“Sure…” He blinks a few times to clear the faraway look from his eyes. “See you, Valentine.”
As my tires begin to roll from the shoulder back onto the roadway, I glance in the rearview when he calls out one last thing.
“Those big signs on the side of the road with the numbers on them? Those are calledspeed limits, Valentine. Pay attention to them, will ya?”
I smile through my tears as I hit the gas pedal.