“Thanks, that’ssohelpful.”
“You could banish him from the kingdom.”
“Suggest a real solution, please.”
“You could… marry him.”
“Chloe! I’m serious.”
“So am I.” She pins me with a look. “I know better than anyone that you have your reasons for not wanting any romantic entanglements. But this isn’t about romance. Accepting a proposal from Alden is about political stability. It may be the only way to keep your throne.”
“I don’t believe that. Ican’tbelieve that.”
“If you marry into the wealthiest family in the country, you’ll appease the nobility. It will completely undercut my mother’s plans to usurp you. Her support system — which, lets face it, seems to be financed by Sterling pursestrings — will evaporate. The Sterlings may be brazen, but they would not campaign against their own son if he were king. That’s social suicide.”
I stare at her. “You’re actually serious.”
She sits down in the chair beside mine, her expression grave. “I just think… if you do not have the freedom to marry for love, you might as well marry a friend. Someone who won’t hurt you. Someone whose company you enjoy. Someone kind and stable and ever-so-conveniently rich.” She pauses. “When you look at it that way… I can’t think of a man better suited for you than Alden Sterling.”
A pang goes through me.
Because she’s right. There’s no man more perfect for me than Alden. Not even the one I would choose for myself.
Carter Thorne is not suited for me.
He does not possess any of the qualities Chloe just listed.
He does not radiate kindness, nor stability.
He pushes my buttons. He tests my boundaries. He makes me question every viewpoint I’ve ever held.
He engages my mind along with my heart, my soul along with my body.
He is the most challenging, stubborn, headstrong man I have ever encountered.
Life with him would not be easy.
Not simple or uncomplicated.
So why do I want it so desperately?
Why can’t I let him go?
As if she’s heard my thoughts, Chloe murmurs, “You have to move on sometime, E. Might as well be sooner than later, if you ask me.”
I look at her sharply. “Move on from what?”
“FromCarter.”
I flinch.
“I know…” Her tone softens. “I know you care for him. I know things between you two are… complex. But I also know, just as you do, that there’s no way the two of you can be together. Especially not now that Ludwig has emerged as a royal alternate.” Her head shakes sadly. “An affair with your stepbrother would be just what your enemies need to justify their calls for your abdication.”
My lips press together, containing angry words I don’t dare speak. I know she’s right, but that doesn’t take the sting out of what she’s saying. The truth falls across my back like a lash, drawing blood.
“I say this not as your sister, but as your official social media advisor,” Chloe continues gently. “I say it because I can see, as much as you might pretend to be fine, you’re still devastated by him leaving.”
“It’s only… I didn’t get to say goodbye,” I whisper, my voice catching. “He justleft. It was so abrupt. There was no closure. So, now, he’s become this… this… thiswoundthat will not heal. And I hate myself for being so weak, but I can barely fuckingbreathesome days, I miss him so badly.” I scoff with self-loathing. “How pathetic is that?”