Exhale.
Endure.
Between the lights and the music and the murmuring crowd, my senses are in overdrive, bombarded by stimuli from all sides. After months of isolation, it’s a harsh adjustment. I feel like an astronaut who’s woken up from hyper-sleep back on their home planet; groggy and dazed, operating at half-speed while the rest of the world spins in fast-forward.
Just a few more minutes,I tell myself, breathing deep through my nose.Then I’ll head back inside to face the serpents.
“You’re not supposed to be in here.”
The icy voice makes my spine straighten and my breath catch. I should’ve known this moment of solace wouldn’t last long. Steeling myself for a battle, I turn slowly around to face her.
She’s annoyingly attractive in the darkness — some pale, unearthly flower that blooms only at night. Deadly magnolia, maybe. Her platinum locks are swept into a complicated twist, her statuesque limbs encased in a dark gold beaded dress. It’s a shame she always wears such a bitchy expression; she’d be even more gorgeous if her veins weren’t made of ice.
“Hello, Ava.”
Chapter Four
Ava Sterling’sfull-lipped mouth twists cruelly as she clicks closer on razor-thin stilettos. She’s always been tall, but in her Louboutins she’s liable to catch altitude sickness.
“Well, well, well. If it isn’t Her Royal Majesty, in the flesh! I must say, I’m shocked you’d actually show up.”
“As if I’d ever pass up a chance to see you, Ava.” Sarcasm sizzles hotly. “It’s alwayssucha joy.”
“I’m flattered. Word has it you’ve become quite a shut-in. I heard you can barely make it through the day without having a panic attack.”
“Youheard?” I shake my head. “Let’s not pretend you aren’t the source of every rumor that circulates about me.”
“On the contrary, I do my best to ignore everything about you.”
“Then why the hell did you follow me in here?”
“Maybe I wanted to witness the crazy up close. See if you’re actually as batshit as the rumors say.” Her smile widens, a she-wolf baring fangs. “If I make a loud noise are you going to dart under a table? If I clap unexpectedly will you duck for cover? Or are your little PTSD episodes merely a ploy for the press cameras? Some pathetic attempt to garner public sympathy?”
My teeth grind together when she brings up the table incident. It happened almost three months ago — one of my first public appearances after the bombings, at the memorial service for a fallen first responder.
One minute I was standing in a funeral reception hall, shaking hands with a firefighter’s widow; the next I was under the refreshment table with my hands pressed over my eyes, hyperventilating. Legs curled up to my chest in the smallest ball I could manage, heart beating so hard it caused physical pain.
I don’t even remember how I got there, let alone the ten minutes it took my guards to coax me out again. Later, I’d learn the bang that triggered my panic attack was a clumsy server dropping a tray. Nothing I’d blink at, under normal circumstances. But in the wake of recent events, even the smallest unexpected sound was enough to trigger my survival instincts.
Run.
Hide.
Now.
Just the mention of that mortifying moment chases away any levity I managed to muster earlier on the dance floor with Alden.
“What?” Ava jeers. “Afraid to answer me?”
“Just shut the fuck up about it,” I snap. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. You have no idea what I’ve been through.”
“Oh, I read all about it in the papers. Everyone did — it’s the only thing they bothered printing for weeks.” Her hazel eyes, twins of her brother’s, roll in their sockets. “Princess Emilia stayed behind to personally help victims evacuate during the terror attack, refusing her guards’ orders for evacuation. Hero-Queen lauded by survivors and their families.” She shakes her head in disbelief. “When this country started confusing idiocy for heroism, I have no idea. Anyone with half a functioning brain cell would realize how irresponsible your actions were.”
“Excuse me?”
“Oh, I think you heard me.” She strides a step closer. “It’s just one more example of why you shouldn’t be wearing that crown. Clearly, you have no idea what it means. How significant it is. Because, when it comes down to it, the life of a queen willalwaysbe of more importance than a few regular people. If you truly cared about your country or your kingdom’s future, you would’ve listened to your guards that day and evacuated without resistance.”
I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Only someone like Ava could turn my actions that day — my attempt to save lives — into a negative. “People were dying. I would’ve had to be a monster to leave them behind.”