My feet stop moving. My breaths are coming too fast. I feel like I’m going to explode from all the emotions rushing into me at once — joy, grief, pain,ecstasy,hope.
Andlove.
Most ofall,love.
It scares the shit outofme.
“Delilah?”
“I— I— I’ll be right back. I need some air,” I gasp, hyperventilating. I spin out of Luca’s arms and race from the room, cutting a path past my friends, who are all wearing identical bewildered expressions. I don’t know where I’m going; I can hardly see straight, through the tears suddenly glossing overmyeyes.
I run and run and run on my high heels, until I round a corner and find myself alone in a dark exhibit, breathing hard. Tanks loom overhead on both sides, creating a tunnel of aqua water lit with fluorescent lights. Purple-veined jellyfish pulse electrically all around me. Their tentacles trail through the water like deadly translucentfingers.
And it’s the strangest thing — as I watch them pulsating, a sort of calm comes over me. Alone, without the crush of people, without the pressure of Luca’s eyes on me, awaiting an answer I’m not sure I can give him, I’m finally able to hear myselfthink.
Luca Buchananlovesme.
His words from yesterday echo in my head. Before the attack, before the night we spent together, before the fight this morning. Before Phoebe got married, before Colton warned me away, before we dancedtogether.
Feeling hopeless, I’d asked what the point of finding your soulmate was, if they were just going to be snatched from you. I didn’t expect the answer he gave me. I didn’t even understand it, in that moment. Not really. But Idonow.
Life is a beautiful, broken mess. Closer to a Shakespearean tragedy than a Hollywood happy ending, in my experience. I don’t have an easy answer to your question about the point ofitall.
I think the only person who can give you that answer isyou. It’s not something anyone can tell you, and it’s not something you can learn from an instruction manual. It’s something you have to discover on your own. Something insideyourself.
I get it now. That thing he was talking about? That answer I was seeking, about the point ofitall?
It’slove.
The pointislove.
Whether it lasts five minutes or fifty years. Fleeting or forever. Any time you get with your soul mate is something to be treasured, not feared. Not pushed aside or avoided out of a misguided attempt at self-preservation.
Luca was right. You can’t refuse to live because you’re so afraid of history repeating. You have to look into the future with wide eyes and a full heart. Like he oncetoldme…
Visualize the outcome youdesire.
Myoutcome?
It looks a lotlikehim.
I wouldn’t trade these past few days for anything. And even if the universe conspires against us… even if we don’t lastforever…
It can’t negate my feelings, or eliminate my memories. It can’t erasethelove.
I am in love with LucaBuchanan.
I’ve been in love with him for months. And I don’t need more time or more space. I don’t need anything except him. Us.Together.
I seize the realization with both hands. Suddenly, I can breathe again. The panic has faded from my bloodstream. The fear and the worry are still there, but they’re crushed under so much hope and happiness, I can barely feel themanymore.
I have totellhim.
Now. This veryminute.
Hearing footsteps, I turn with a smile already on my face. I half expect to see my handsome fighter coming around the corner, seekingmeout…
Instead, my heart flails inside mychest.