“Oh, no, I meant about settling down,” Chase tells the woman, still looking at me. “Sunshine, what do you think? One kid? Two? I’ve always thought three might be too many, but if we had four, so they each had a playmate, maybe it wouldn’t be half bad.”
My jaw falls open.
I hear Mrs. Breeland gasp.
Chase grins. “Once you hit five, it’s basically a litter. But there’s a certain elegance in a clean half-dozen, don’t you think?”
He’s joking.
I know he’s joking, just to piss off this lady for disrespecting me.
But I’m having a little trouble processing the humor in his words, what with the images of our half-dozen green-eyed, towheaded, paint-splattered babies running around the yard.
“Um…” I squeak.
Chase looks back at Mrs. Breeland. “Tell Cherie hello, for me. I’m sure she’ll find someone soon, with a mother like you extolling her many graces at every opportunity.” His grin widens when she clucks in shock. “Now, if you’ll excuse us, we need to find a broom closet somewhere and get started making those babies. Or, at the very least, practicing.”
With that, he nods to Mr. Breeland, pivots with me still tight against his side, and starts walking toward the bar.
“Nasty old bird,” he mutters. “And I remember her daughter — just as snotty, even as kids.”
“Um,” I squeak again.
“Gemma, relax. It was a joke.”
“Uh huh,” I agree, trying to calm my racing heartbeat.
“I’m not going to impregnate you with a half-dozen babies.”
“Oh, good.” I breathe out a huge sigh of relief.
“Not yet, anyway.”
“What?!”
He chuckles. “Come on, let’s get you a drink.”
A drink would be good.
Actually, seven drinks would be good.
But I’ll stick to a single glass of pinot noir and hope it’s enough to take the edge off… and make me forget about Chase’s seriously not-amusing jokes.
***
“Is your uncle here, yet?”
Chase looks at me. “Jameson?”
I nod.
We’re in a small alcove by the bar, surveying the room as I sip my wine. Chase is pointing out the different couples, telling me some of their scandalous family backstories, which range from alcoholism to accidental pregnancies to the occasional fetish — it’s allveryentertaining — but I can’t help but notice he’s been tiptoeing around actually introducing me to any of his family members. Which is weird… considering we’re at a Croft event, and all.
“No, he’s not here.”
My eyes widen. “But didn’t he plan this whole thing? One last hurrah as CEO and all that? It’s kind of weird he wouldn’t come to his own party.”
“He’s not well.” Chase’s words are flat. “He probably won’t come until dinner, to make his speech.”