“I’m sorry about earlier.”
His arms tighten around me. “I know.”
“This stuff — letting you in — it doesn’t come naturally to me.” I take a deep breath, trying desperately to keep my voice from shaking. “He’s got another family, you know. That’s why he didn’t stay with my mom.”
Chase stills completely, his eyes on mine. “I know.”
“I have an older brother I’ve never met. A little sister, too.” I swallow. “I always wanted siblings. Even more than I wanted a father, growing up, I wanted brothers and sisters to play with.”
Chase’s fingers stroke through my hair.
“It was just me and Mom. She didn’t ever tell me about him — she just said he left us, before I was born. She didn’t want me to know I was half West.” I sigh. “I get why she kept it from me, now. She didn’t want me to see the life we almost had. It would’ve been like telling a little street urchin her father was the king — that she should’ve been a princess, not a pauper.”
“How did you find out?”
“I found the letters, when I was fifteen. She kept them in her jewelry box. I was trying on her necklaces, one day, when she wasn’t home. And there they were, at the bottom of the drawer. Letters from my father.” I take another steadying breath. “I was so mad, it sent me into a tailspin. Drinking, drugs, boys — any trouble I could get my hands on. The rest of my teenage years passed in a blur. I was mad for a long time.” My hands curl involuntarily. “I’m still mad, if I’m being honest. Not with Mom — with him. Milo. For doing that to her.”
“And to you,” Chase adds softly.
I’m silent for a moment, trying to work up a denial but unable to do it. I can’t lie about this — not to Chase — so I lay my head against his chest and listen to his heartbeat, willing myself not to cry. He doesn’t push me; he just pets my hair in long, soothing strokes, reassuring me without words that I’ll be all right. I press my eyes closed and hug him so tight it’s probably hard to breathe, but he never complains.
“He didn’t stay,” I whisper finally, my words hollow.
Chase’s lips brush my forehead and his arms tighten to hold me closer.
My voice is little more than a whisper.
“No one ever stays.”
A single tear escapes my eyelid and drips onto his bare chest. He flinches when he feels it, as though a bullet’s hit his chest instead of a single drop of moisture. As though that tiny tear causes him physical pain.
I don’t let any more escape, and he doesn’t say anything.
He just holds me in the darkness, his arms so tight they’re almost painful, and lends me his strength.
It’s only later, much later, when my breaths have slowed and I’ve nearly nodded off to sleep that I feel lips brush against the shell of my ear and hear the echo of soft-rasped words, so distant I can’t tell whether they’re real or the fragment of a dream.
“I’ll stay, sunshine. For you, I’ll stay.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Burn
When I wake in the morning, Chase is gone. I register the absence of him — of his heat, of his scent, of the reassuring thud of his heartbeat — before I’m even fully conscious. Disappointment pumps through my veins as my eyes blink open, locking instantly on the empty space where he used to be. When I catch sight of the sheet of paper lying on his pillow, covered in neat lines of elegant, masculine script, I vault upright and greedily pull it close to make out his words.
Gemma,
You looked too peaceful to wake, no matter how much I wanted a kiss goodbye.
I’ll settle for hoping you’re dreaming of me, instead.
I have a business meeting across the city this morning, so I’ll be gone for a few hours. Make yourself at home. Evan is downstairs in the lobby — if you need anything and you can’t reach me, he’ll take care of you.
I called in a few favors and the press has agreed to table the story, for now. Pissing off the Crofts isn’t good for business — and when I told them just how pissed I’d be if they upset my girlfriend, they backed off. Very quickly.
I know yesterday was tough. But today will be a better day, sunshine. I’m sure of it. After all — no day that begins with you wrapped in my arms can possibly turn out to be anything but beautiful. I’ll see you soon.
Yours,