“Back in the house, when we were doing that interview about our first impressions of each other, you said you were intrigued by why I felt the need to hide my vulnerability in public.” He paused, and she nodded, recalling the moment. “The truth is, I don’t hide it. You just crack me open in a way that no one else can. In a way that honestly scares me, but I’ve known since the day we met that I wanted to be that open. With you. I love you.”
All his guards were down, the walls utterly demolished. He was wide open and welcoming her in with no barriers. She remembered what he’d said that day, how he’d called herThe Onewhile he’d scribbled his number in her notebook. She saw on his face now that it hadn’t been a cheeky joke, an attempt at ice-breaking, charming humor since they’d only just met. It had been the bone-deep certainty that would hold them together through all the ups and downs. Now he was finally giving voice to the steady current that had flowed beneath the surface of their relationship from the start. He’d leapt headfirst and was waiting for her to join him.
She scooted her body up along his and pressed her lips to his mouth for a slow, deep kiss. It burned all the way to her toes. Chuck let out a low, warm hum and rolled on his side to face her. She thought they were going to maybe go for a roundtwo, but he pulled back and stroked her hair with a soft smile. His eyes melted into tender hazel pools and clearly said he was eagerly waiting for her to join him in the newly named territory.
But before she could join him, she had to say something else first.
“Chuck, I’m sorry about what happened at the house. Likereallysorry.”
He smoothed his thumb over her swollen lips while he shook his head. “Olivia, don’t worry—”
“No, I need to say this.” She pushed herself up against the pillows and pulled the sheet to her chest. She’d put almost as much work into figuring out what she was going to say to him as she had into writing her profile. She took a deep breath. “I…run. You’re right. It took me running out on a million dollars to see how much of a problem it is—still very sorry, by the way. But I see it now. Not only do I run, but I also push you away. And it’s because I’m scared. I’m scared of getting hurt, but most of all, I’m scared of ending up alone. Abandoned.” Her voice hitched, and he reached out to tenderly stroke her cheek. “I probably need to spend a few years with a really good therapist to fully understand why, but I’m pretty sure it’s because of my parents. I spent my whole life thinking they didn’t care about me, that I was some unfortunate consequence of their affair and they’d rather have been out at parties than home with me—and I know that’s not true now, but it left a mark. Theyleftme. The people who were supposed to care for and protect me the most. They didn’t do it on purpose, obviously, but it left this…holein me, and a fear that it’s going to happen again. That someone else who is supposed to care for and protect me is going to leave. That’s why I run. Because if Ileave first, no one can leave me.” A tear pinched out her eye and rolled down her cheek. He swiped it with his thumb.
“But you—” Her voice cut off with a bumpy stutter. She dashed her eyes and wetly smiled. “Sorry. I’m not very good at this.”
He sweetly smiled back and wiped her tears again. “You’re doing great.” His own voice was strained, thick with emotion.
“Thank you,” she said with a sniffle. She took a steadying breath and felt her eyes grow wetter. “You make it all hurt less, Chuck. The truth is, I love you. Very much. So much that it scares me. Because I’m afraid—”
He scrambled to sit up when her words dissolved again. He held her face and kissed away her tears before he wrapped her in his arms. His heart thudded against her; his skin felt hot with emotion. When he pulled back to hold her face and look into her eyes, his swam with deep feeling. “I love you so much that it scares me too. Liketerrifiesme,” he said. “Every time we fight, and you run, I’m afraid you’re never going to come back, and I—”
“I don’t want to run anymore,” she said with a hard sob. “Not from you. Never from you.”
He kissed her again and squeezed her whole body against his. She felt it in his touch: as much as she didn’t want to run, he didn’t want to ever let her go.
There was suddenly, resolutely, no more uncertainty about their future.
They pulled at each other, tugging their bodies as close as they could get. Inhaling the other like they needed it to survive. Their embrace slowly turned into something hungrier, more desperate. He pulled her over on top of him to straddle his lap, and she sank down onto him, taking every inch until they were fused together again. Soon she was gripping the headboardabove him with both hands and trying not to black out as he squeezed her thighs and hit a spot inside her so intense that she could hardly breathe when she saw stars this time.
She collapsed on top of him afterward and nearly fell asleep to the feel of his fingertips lazily stroking her spine.
“So we’re in love, but we’re still broke,” he said.
She chortled a laugh, still lifelessly draped over him like a jungle cat on a tree branch. “Yeah. That.”
He inhaled a deep breath that inflated his chest and lifted her with it. When he let it out, she rolled off him but stayed cradled in the crook of his arm.
“I guess it’s not too different than we were two weeks ago, we’re just more aware now. You were right: being in that house was what we needed,” she said with a lazy grin up at him.
He smoothed her wild hair and kissed her forehead. “Look at us. Growth.”
She curled against his body and pressed a kiss into his chest. “And I’m glad we can touch each other now without losing any money or having to hide.”
“Yes, definitely a perk of freedom,” he growled, and pulled her back on top of him once more. He buried his lips in her neck, and she squealed with laughter as tingles shot down her arm.
When he let her go, she propped herself on her elbows and gazed down at him. His eyes were honey warm, his cheeks flushed. His lips beautifully swollen from kissing her. His hair, an even more hopeless nest. She pushed it back from his face and saw the tiny scar he had from falling off his bike as a kid. “Can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
She mulled her words, not wanting to burst the warmbubble they were floating inside. “When your sister told me about Maddy, she said it was fine because Maddy had toldherthe whole story while it was happening and before the NDA was in place. Why didn’t you tellmeat that same time while you were still able to?”
His glow dimmed a few notches. An invisible tension pulled his face taut. His brow knit. “Honestly, I was worried what you would think. I felt responsible for the whole thing. I mean, my kid sister’s best friend, and I served her up on a platter to that jerk. And Maddy was so upset by it all—rightfully so. I didn’t want to disappoint you. And then Richard paid me off, which made me feel like even more of a degenerate.” He scrubbed his face with a hand. “And I’m so sorry about those photos. I don’t know who took them, but I wouldn’t be surprised if TJ himself got them to run the story so that they could spring it on us that morning with no warning. They knew I had an NDA and we’d agreed they wouldn’t bring up my job. It was supposed to be off-limits, but TJ went rogue.”
Olivia snorted. “Somehow not surprising.”
“I know, but I still hate that it happened. Even if the photos aren’t what they look like, I know that was a terrible situation for you given your history. But I couldn’t tell you the truth, especially not on camera, because of the NDA. God, what a mess. Everything is my fault.”
The remorse in his voice made Olivia’s heart ache. She removed his hand that he’d placed back over his face and pressed her thumb to his brow to smooth out the deep crease. “Chuck, first of all, TJ is an asshole. And you weren’t the one who ran out of the house. That was me, remember? And second, what happened with Maddy wasn’t your fault. She is lucky you were there to intervene at all. You were put in a terrible position eventhough you tried to do the right thing—and you put that money to good use. Chelsea told me you’re paying her tuition.”