My throat tightens. I should drink something.
I start with the vodka, eyeballing what I hope is twice the amount Kristen put in my first drink. Then I go over to the table, popping some gummy worms in my mouth while I execute a slow pour so that the sprite won’t bubble up and force me to wait for it to simmer before I can add more.
Pretzels. Chocolate. Gummies.
Drink.
Nerds. Chips. Chipsandsalsa.
Drink.
A slice of pizza from a box that has been sitting on the table open for God knows how long. Another slice.
Drink.
Maurice doesn’t reappear, so I drink some more.
“Come On Eileen” ends—a blessing if you ask me—and “SexLies” by Latto comes on, which clearly means it’s time for me to dance.
I squeeze my way into the living room, suddenly not as nervous about being alone in a room full of people I barely know. More and more people press in, limiting the amount of space there is for any single person to jump around and shake their hips. Whether more people have arrived or it’s been this crowded since I got here, I don’t know.
And I don’t care. I just start moving, savoring the way the volume of the music drowns outeverythingelse.
A girl dressed as an angel bumps hips with me, her drink sloshing a little and nearly landing on my white tee. We both look up at the near disaster at the same time, and for some reason this isincrediblyhilarious. I laugh so hard that I feel a cramp trying to take hold in my gut and double over to stop it.
Someone dressed as Luke fromGilmore Girlsjoins us, the angel rubbing against him in a way that could mean they know each other, or this is what it looks like for them toget to knoweach other.
I sip my drink, not even cringing as sweet bubbles sting the back of my throat and warm my stomach.
Captain Save a Hoe materializes, getting pushed into our little trio from the crowd surrounding us.
“Sis, you got moves!” Rowena shouts, taking my hand and holding it above my head.
I spin once, then twice, then stop when the room seems to spin faster than me.
“Are you okay?” she asks, leaning in close. “Do you want me to get Hannah?”
“Shhhhhh!” I hold my finger up to my lips and grab her shoulder to keep from tipping over. “You can’ttellanyone, remember?”
I don’t know when she slips my cup from my hand, but I watch Rowena take a sip of my drink, her lips pinching together and then spreading into a smile.
“Jeez.”She’s smiling though, like she’s proud. “Sit tight, I’ll be right back.”
She leaves, and only when I go back to bumping hips with the angel and we get to a part in the song where everyone throws their hands in the air do I realize my hands are empty.
She stole my drink!
“Clarity?”
I spin around, almost unable to stop, but Jack Sparrow catches me in her arms. Well, in one arm, because Hannah’s other is holding a cup out of reach so that it doesn’t spill.
“Drink this.”
Gladly.
I take long pulls, the alcohol somehow making water taste like what I imagine being in heaven feels like. It’s brilliant, so brilliant that I finish the entire cup and hand it back to Hannah.
She looks down, not expecting it to be empty, and smiles at me. “Come on, you,” she says, taking my hand.