“Can I go back on the slide, Mommy?”
“Sure.”
Tony looks like he wants to protest, but I hold up a hand, cutting him off until Joey’s out of earshot.
“He doesn’t know you, and he’s only three. If you start talking about being his father he’s going to be confused. Start off as a friend, then if things go well, you can move on to Daddy.” The idea makes me a little sick, but Tony seems to be considering it.
“The thing is, I don’t have a lot of time.”
“And that’s not going to change,” I gently point out. “So, if he’s important to you, you have to make time for him.”
“What if I want to make time for you?” He slides closer on the bench.
I try not to flinch. “That’s not happening.”
“Look, if you move to Minneapolis, I can take care of both of you. I’ll set you up in a nice little house, in a good school district. You can do your thing, whatever you want, and I can see him when I’m not traveling.”
“I’m not going to upset my whole life and support system to move to Minneapolis,” I say. “That’s not reasonable.”
“He’s my son.” His tone shows the first glimmer of annoyance. “You can’t keep him from me.”
“I never kept him from you. That was your choice.”
He sighs. “You need to get over that, Serena. I made a mistake. I admit it. But now I’m trying to make up for it. Can you meet me halfway?”
“You need to slow down. This is a lot for him.”
“Well, I’m trying to change that!”
“Mommy, look!” Joey goes down the slide headfirst and gets to the bottom laughing.
“Good job!” I call. “Do it again.”
So he does.
And Tony and I just watch. Sliding. Running. Playing. Climbing the monkey bars.
“So, uh, is this it?” he asks after about fifteen minutes. “You just watch him run around?”
“Sometimes. Other times I play with him. Or we just walk along the trails.”
“Does he play sports?”
“He’s three. He can’t even join T-ball until he’s four.”
“Does he skate?”
“West has started teaching him.”
“I don’t want that guy teaching my sonanything.” There’s that tone again.
“That’s not your call.”
“Dammit, Serena! He’s my kid and I get to have a say!”
“Not after being absent for three years, you don’t.”
He sighs dramatically. “You want money, right?”