Our tour guide for the afternoon was Oscar, and he seemed too excited to wrap a snake around my neck. “Don’t worry,” he said, patting me on the back as we headed toward the snake cages, “they don’t bite, and if they do, you’ll probably be dead so quick you wouldn’t even feel a thing.”
It was meant to be a joke, but I didn’t laugh.
I was too busy being tense.
Oscar grabbed one of the animals, and without a thought, I took a step back. Shay laughed at my retreat, but she didn’t step any closer to the creature herself. She seemed as nervous as I was.Good. Equal playing field.She was acting all confident upuntil we were finally in the room with the beasts. Now she was more wide-eyed and concerned as she slowly chewed her candy.
“Ladies first,” I offered, gesturing toward Charlie—the garter snake.
Shay took a deep breath, balled up her Laffy Taffy, and shoved it into her mouth.
Thatta girl.
She was quiet as she walked over to the snake. I watched as she flinched a few times as Oscar moved the creature in her direction, but she allowed it to be placed in her hands. She shivered and wiggled around.
My mind couldn’t even wrap my head around what it felt like. I was still eyeing the exit.
After a few different snakes, and me passing on holding them, Shay started clucking again. She even added in the chicken-arm movements, flapping her arms.
“Fine,” I groaned. “Give me the snake.”
The last one we met was Greta, and she was a freaking giant monster of a ball python.
Oscar had me hold my hands out.
“Shaking won’t help the situation,” he warned.
“Listen, this is the best you’re going to get out of me, so just put the snake in my palms, OK?”
I snapped at the dude, and I felt semi-bad about it, too. My nerves were getting the best of me. Sweat was dripping down my forehead, and my vision was blurring over. But still, I wasn’t going to punk out—not with Shay watching. That would’ve given her too much joy.
He lowered the snake into the palms of my hands, and within seconds, everything went black.
* * *
“Landon... hey, Landon. Wake up, get up,” a voice said as my head stirred. I opened my left eye to see Shay’s face hovering over mine. “Oh, thank goodness. I thought I killed you,” she exclaimed.
I pushed up on my hands to come to a sitting position. I rubbed my arm up and down. “What just happened?”
“Well, it didn’tjusthappen. You blacked out for five minutes,” she explained. “I was already planning out your funeral, but then, like the Satan you are, you rose from the ashes.”
I groaned and went to stand up. As I stood, I got extremely dizzy. I began stumbling, but Shay caught my arm, making me balance more.
“Easy,” she said, her voice low and almost sounding like she cared. “You should probably get checked out. You fell face-first.”
“I’m fine. Perhaps we should leave the reptiles alone, though.”
“Oh...” Shay nodded slowly and raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, we’re not really allowed back in this place, seeing as how, when you fell, you tossed Greta into another cage, and... yeah, we’re not welcome back.”
“Oh, man. That’s too bad. I was really hoping to come back and spend more money on this crap.”
“It’s not your lucky day, I guess.”
I studied her lips as she spoke to me. The longer I stared, the more focus I was able to retrieve. My head was still foggy, but I knew a few more seconds of staring at Shay would clear it right up.
“We should probably get you home so you can ice your forehead,” she commented. I ran my fingers across it, and there was a big knot. Great. I had Pinocchio’s nose growing out of my forehead. I felt like shit, but I didn’t want her to know that. I needed to act tough. I couldn’t have Shay thinking I had weaknesses—even though I’d just fainted in front of her.
I didn’t argue with the idea of going home. The sooner I was away from those animals, the better.