The one with the eye-patch pursed his lips. “Want a head start?” he asked pointedly.
She grinned up at him. “You want one?” she countered.
He chuckled, and indicated that she could go first. He turned and winked at the little brunette, who flushed with pleasure. He was whistling as he followed Cappie out through the waiting room.
“You, protect us,” the other man scoffed. “From what…bug bites?”
“Keep that up,” Cappie told him, “and I’ll show you a bite.”
“Now, now, let’s try to get along,” Dead-Eye murmured as they waited for the elevator to come back up.
“I’m getting along. She’s the one with the attitude problem,” the other man muttered.
“Says you,” Cappie told him.
He stared at Dead-Eye and pointed at Cappie.
“I never take sides in family squabbles,” Dead-Eye told him.
“She is not a member of my family!” the other man said.
“A likely story,” Dead-Eye said. “Anyway, how can you be sure? Have you had your DNA compared to hers?”
“I know I’m not related to you,” the man told Dead-Eye.
“How do you know that?” came the dry retort.
“Because you’re too ugly to be any kin to me.”
“Well, I never,” Dead-Eye harrumphed. “Look who’s calling whougly.”
“Your mother dresses you funny, too.”
Cappie was already light-headed with relief. These two were setting off her quirky sense of humor. “I can’t take the two of you anywhere,” she complained. “You embarrass me to tears.”
“Can I help it if he’s ugly?” the second man said. “I was only stating a fact.”
“He’s not ugly,” Cappie defended Dead-Eye. “He’s just unique.”
Dead-Eye grinned at her. “We can get married first thing in the morning,” he said. “I’ve been keeping a wedding ring in my chest of drawers for just such an emergency.”
Cappie shook her head. “Sorry. I can’t marry you tomorrow.”
“Why not?”
“My brother won’t let me date ugly men.”
“You just said I wasn’t ugly!” he protested.
“I lied.”
“I can have my nose fixed.”
She frowned. It was a very nice nose.
“I can alter it for you with my fist,” the other man volunteered.
“I can alter you first,” Dead-Eye informed him.