Logan placed a quick kiss on her cheek as he gripped the base of the plug and pulled it free. She closed her eyes tightly as the thickest part passed, sighing in relief—and disappointment—as he dropped it to the floor by the bed.
She felt…empty.
“That was…” Lacy couldn’t find the words.
Logan simply nodded, looking at her so intently she had to fight the urge to glance away. He could see too much and she didn’t have the strength to hide, to shelter her emotions.
“You’re incredible, Lacy.”
She closed her eyes and pretended there wasn’t going to be a “but” added to the end of that statement. She could read him too. Whatever he’d just seen in her face—and she was pretty sure it was pure, unadulterated, undying love—had helped him batten down his hatches.
He was going to break her heart.
“We can’t do this again.”
She tried to push herself upright, but her arms were still weak so it took some effort. “Why not?”
“You’ve had a crush on me since you were a kid.”
She blushed and glanced down. “I wasn’t sure you knew that.”
He cupped her cheek, forcing her gaze to meet his. “It was pretty hard to miss. I didn’t know you knew about Yvette, that you’d followed us. God, Lacy. How much of what you’re feeling right now is based on what you know about me and my needs? How do you know this is really what you want?”
She scowled. “Um…maybe because I’m a fucking adult and I know what I like.”
“Jane pretended she liked BDSM at first too. We fell in love with each other and when those emotions were new it was easy for her to go along with my desires because she wanted to make me happy. In the end, she wound up resenting me for what I wanted.”
“I’m not pretending.”
“How can you be sure?”
She snapped. Her temper flaring red-hot. “I can!”
“I don’t want to hurt you. You’re the last person on earth I’d ever want to hurt.”
The anger that had flashed dissolved into heartbreak. “You’re hurting me now.”
“And that’s why I need to leave.”
Fourteen years earlier…
* * *
“I think it’s on the back porch,” Evan yelled from the kitchen.
Lacy glanced up, surprised when Logan stepped outside. She turned her head away from him quickly, not wanting him to see her cry. She’d had a crush on Logan her entire life, so it was just her luck he’d show up and catch her ugly crying.
“Hey, Lace.” He walked over to retrieve a cooler. Logan and Evan were going camping with a bunch of their friends for the weekend. Needless to say, once again, she had been deemed too young to tag along.
“Hey,” she said, not looking his direction.
She was used to being invisible to her brother’s friends. They were eight years older and there was precious little a gang of twenty-somethings had in common with a thirteen-year-old. So she hadn’t expected Logan to walk over to where she was slowly rocking on her mom’s loveseat glider.
“You crying?”
She shook her head, refusing to face him. Of course, she didn’t help her lie by reaching up to wipe away her tears.
“What’s wrong?”