The collar.
My collar.The one he had put on me during the contract, the one he had removed so cruelly during the rejection.He should have thrown it away.But there it sat, the silver chain catching the dim light.
He had kept it.
I slipped out of his arms before I could second-guess myself.Crossed the room naked, aware of his eyes tracking every step.Picked up the collar, the familiar weight settling in my hands.The silver was still shiny, the diamond studded ring still sparkling.Like he had been maintaining it.Waiting.
“Lena.”His voice was careful.“You don’t have to.”
I turned to face him.He was propped up on one elbow, watching me with an expression I could read now that I knew him better.Hope, barely restrained.And fear that the hope would be crushed.
I lifted the collar and fastened it around my own throat.
The click of the clasp was loud in the silence.The cold chain settled against my skin, becoming warm with my body heat.My fingers adjusted it, centering the clasp at the back of my neck, and I looked at him.
“The ring was forced on me,” I said.“This is my choice.”
His sharp intake of breath filled the room.For a long moment, he did not move.
Then he was out of the bed and crossing to me, pulling me against him, his hands cupping my face.
“Lena.”My name was reverent.Shattered.“Do you understand what that means to me?”
“I think so.”I covered his hands with mine.“The ring was your obligation.The contract was your revenge.But this…” I touched the collar at my throat.“This is me saying I want to be yours.Not because I have to.Because I choose to.”
He kissed me.Deep and desperate and full of a tenderness that undid me more than any passion could.
When he finally pulled back, he lifted me in his arms and carried me back to bed.The collar pressed warm against my throat as he settled me against the pillows.His hand came up to touch it, tracing the chain with fingers that trembled slightly.
“You kept it,” I said.
“I couldn’t let it go.”His voice was rough.“Even when I told myself you would never forgive me.Even when I thought I had destroyed everything.I kept it because it meant you were mine, even when you weren’t.”
“I am now.”
He pulled me close, and I let myself be held.
I love him, I thought as sleep began to pull me under.The words surfaced without permission, without defense.The man and the wolf.Both sides.I love him.
I did not say it out loud.Not yet.But I knew it now.
His voice was soft in the darkness, barely more than a whisper.“I don’t deserve you.”
Maybe we’ll earn each other, I thought.
I fell asleep with his arms around me, the collar warm against my throat.For the first time since my father died, I was not afraid of what morning would bring.
22
RAPHAEL
I woke to her scent, warm and sweet, and for a long moment I did not move.
She was still here.Still in my arms.Still wearing the collar she had put on herself, the silver chain warm against her throat where my hand rested.Her breathing was slow and even, her body soft and trusting against mine.
Ours.My wolf’s voice was quiet for once.Not demanding.Satisfied.Finally ours.
The word settled into my chest like a key turning in a lock.After months of fighting the urge to claim her, the relief of finally giving in was almost unbearable.The hollow hunger that had lived in my chest since that first night was finally, finally filled.Not the raw want I was used to, not the desperate need, not the howling demand that had driven me since the moment I first caught her scent in that lobby.This was quieter.Deeper.True.