“Again,fuckno,” Kieran said without hesitation. “Unless, I mean…Doyouwant to stop, Arken?”
His eyes were earnest, searching mine for answers, hunting for the subtle truths he knew I kept locked behind my teeth. He knew me too well. He saw straight through my bullshit, every godsdamned time.
“I…I don’t, but?—”
“Butnothing,Asher,” Kieran interrupted.
No, not nothing. Everything. Everything is at stake here, Kieran. There is so much at risk. There is so much to lose…at least for me, if not for you.
“We made those rules for areason,”I whispered, the words feeling like agony ripped from my tongue.
“Fuck the rules,” Kieran growled, one hand cupping my jaw to tilt my chin upward, demanding I look him in the eye. “Please, Arken. Let’s try to pause the overthinking for just a moment, okay? Breathe with me.”
Following his lead, I took a few slow, measured breaths.
“Thank you, sweetheart. Now, answer me this: What do you want right now?”
“It’s not that simple, Kier,” I protested. It really wasn’t. “That doesn’t—we stillshouldn’t?—”
He cut me off again. “That’s not what I asked. Consequences be damned, Arken. If nothing else mattered—what wouldyouwant, right now? At this very moment?”
Abyss take me, this man was maddening. I was trying so desperately to be the voice of reason, to cut our losses here. My grasp on old boundaries was already tenuous at best because the answer ran through my veins. It was in the air I breathed, the aether I drew upon—the answer had carved itself into my body and bones with every kiss, every touch. He had no idea what it truly meant when I whispered my response, but I offered it to him anyway. It felt cruel to deny it.
“I want you,” I breathed.
“Thentake me,Little Conduit,” Kieran said with a gentle sort of authority, simultaneously a plea and a command. He lifted his hand from my jaw to brush his knuckles ever-so-gently across my cheek. “It’s as simple as that.”
It’s as simple as that.
The words echoed in my mind, a pleasant humming reverberation. I let the levity of such a statement fill my chest, imagining the absence of complication, the ease…I had always loved that about him. Howeasyit was to be near Kieran, the way I never seemed to tire of his presence. His friendship seemed to lift burdens I hadn’t known I was carrying, his very existence taking a profound weight off my shoulders. There was a certain simplicity in that, I could not deny it. And yet…
“Nothing about us is simple, Kier,” I whispered.
“It could be,” he replied softly, still stroking my cheek. “If we let it.”
Just let it be simple, Arken. Just this once.
At the end of the day, I knew I wasn’t strong enough. I couldn’t let him go, couldn’t walk away from this if I tried—andso, I leaned in for a kiss, brushing my still-swollen lips against his in gentle request. His tongue coasted lasciviously over my lower lip, welcoming the interruption to our conversation. My lips parted, inviting him to take things further…So further he went. The frantic fervor of last night came rushing back as soon as that low groan escaped his mouth, and I found myself needily grinding up against his thigh in search of friction and pressure.
“Fuck, Arken,” he rasped. “Aren’t you tired of me yet?”
“Not even close,” I murmured against his mouth, hooking my leg around one of his.
How could I possibly tire of this? Of him?
“Thank the gods,” he said as I shifted myself, straddling his lap so I could kiss him harder, deeper, and longer. So that I might moan freely while he palmed my breasts, an appreciative smirk crawling up his mouth as I began to rock my hips, coating his cock with the slick arousal and heat that had been pooling between my legs all morning.
“Thank thefuckinggods,” he said again, the words an echo of where this all began.
Thank the fucking gods, indeed.
CHAPTER TWO
KIERAN
When I first woke this morning, I thought I was still dreaming.
I mean, this had to be a dream, right?