“And you haven’t taken him home yet because...?” Laurel asked, flicking a pebble at my forehead with irritating accuracy. Damned Earth Conduits.
“First of all, that’s the second time I’ve even had a face to face interaction with the man,” I argued. “Second of all...” I trailed off.
“Girl. Don’t tell me its nerves. I saw the way he was looking at you in the Wyldwoods. He wants you. Like,bad.”
Did he?
You and that wicked tongue of yours…
Maybe.
“I mean, it’s not necessarily nerves so much as...”
“As what? Spit it out, Asher,” Laurel prodded. “I need to know this. For science. Consider this me studying Bios. The mysteries of human willpower, if you will.”
I sighed. “I haven’t slept with anyone since my ex, back home.”
“Ah, I see. Sounds like there’s some baggage with that one?”
“With Grays?” I sighed, running one hand through my hair. “Absolutely. I’m pretty sure she still hates me.”
“Grays, eh? That’s a femme name. Am I to believe Miss Asher goes both ways, then?” Laurel smirked.
I grinned. “I most certainly do.”
“A victory for all the sapphics in Sophrosyne, honestly,” Laurel replied, raising her bottle as if it were a toast. “But, apologies. I got us off track. The Grays situation—you wanna talk about it?”
Not particularly, I thought to myself. I generally tried toavoidthinking about Graysen. Everything about that breakup had been inevitable. And everything about it had been my fault.
“Nah, not really. It’s old news at this point. But I’m also not looking for a relationship any time soon.”
“Fair enough. I’m not much for long term commitments either,” Laurel replied easily. “I fully plan to sample my way through the city... For now, at least.”
“Just for now?”
“Yeah, well. My parents are still Hel-bent on trying to set me up with an ‘advantageous marriage.’ Archaic fucks. My father apparently has some loose agreement with the Lord of Clay that I might marry his heir, Anders—with the right trade agreements in place.”
“Gross.”
“Yeah. I was so annoyed about him springing that shit on me the day before I left, trying to sell me off like cattle. I didn’t even bother telling him that if I had to settle down with a fucking Cragg, it would beHanna—not Anders.”
“Would that bother him?” I frowned. Same sex pairings were almost as common as heterosexual relationships, especially among the noblesse.
“Nah, I just didn’t want to encourage the auctioning of my own agency. I’m sure Mama will course correct that eventually. And on the bright side, Hanna Cragg is hot as Hel.”
“I do like a woman who has her priorities straight,” I cackled.
“Only damn thing that’s straight about me,” Laurel agreed, clinking her bottle against mine.
Maybe an hour or so worth of casual conversation and quippy remarks passed us by until Laurel and I both fell asleep, lazing around like cats in the sun. I stirred first, though—and decided to let her rest just a little while longer. Meanwhile, I meandered over to the edge of the building again, my mind wandering through the haze of strawberry wine and the balmy breeze.
Life in Sophrosyne was… different from what I had expected. Back home in the Brindlewoods, I had pictured myself a shut-in, furiously thumbing through books and researching all day andnight. Before I set sail for the City of the Gods, my intentions had felt so singular:
Find out who—orwhat—I really was.
I certainly hadn’t pictured myself making fast friends, flirting with dangerous and alluring men, and getting drunk on rooftops. But maybe this was what I actually needed, for now. A sense of belonging. Something I’d never quite found for myself, even back home… because I was born alone.
According to Amaretta, they found me in the woods. Alone, abandoned as an infant, in the middle of the night on a full moon. Somewhat unusual, sure—but she told me people abandoned their children all the time for a multitude of reasons. Shame, poverty, fear.