“I mean, it made sense. Befriending her would probably be the easiest way one could keep a close eye on a freshling.”
“It certainly is a strategy one could take, yes,” I mused, noncommittal.
“But… that’s not the only reason you’re doing it, is it? Not anymore, at least?”
It was never the reason, but I neither confirmed nor denied that particular inference. After a brief pause, studying Jeremiah’s curious expression, I spoke again.
“Does it matter?”
“Yes,” he replied, almost immediately.
“And why is that?” I asked, keeping my tone even and non-accusatory, even though Jer was approaching dangerous ground.
“Because we protect our own, Captain.”
I raised a brow.
“You’re sworn to protect every citizen in Sophrosyne, Lieutenant. You took an oath,” I reminded him coolly.
“Yes, sir. But if the girl matters to you, that’s different.”
Again, I paused, deliberating on how difficult I wanted to be about my answer. Part of me wanted to challenge the man, make him explain exactly what made Arken different from anyone else in the city. But the other part of me knew exactly what he was implying, and I was sort of touched that he cared.
“Kieran, you know we’d watch over her either way. But… I’ve never seen you invest in anyone. Not a damn soul outside of the Guard. Not like this. Not like her. And with the way shit’s been going lately, what with the threats and the kidnappings…”
I tilted my head, curious.
“Do you care about her, sir? Is she one of ours?”
I sighed, unable to deny what my lieutenant had clearly picked up on. The girl was important to me. More so than I had ever intended. More so than I really cared to admit.
“Yeah. I do. She is,” I confessed.
“That’s all I needed to know, Captain.”
I nodded once, pretending to be particularly interested in one of the stray missives I picked up, avoiding Jeremiah’s gaze.
“By the way,” Jer added. “Hans and I, and a couple of the boys are going to hit The Clover tonight. There are a few traveling entertainers in town, most of us are off tomorrow, and today’s been shit—seems like a damn good excuse to get plastered. You in?”
I opened my mouth to politely decline, and then closed it for a moment as I thought better of it. Wasn’t that where Arken would be tonight, too?
If anything, that should have been even more of a reason to politely decline. If I were a more respectful man, I would be giving Arken her own space to let loose after her entryexams without my brooding, over-protective ass watching her prospective suitors like a hawk.
Too bad I wasn’t a particularly respectful man.
“Eh. Sure, why not?” I said.
“Atta boy, Captain!” Jeremiah replied jovially. “C’mon then. We’re leaving soon.”
Chapter Forty-One
Arken
It could have been the honey-whiskey or the wine talking, butgods,I felt alive.
I didn’t drink that often, but I was starting to think that Laurel just might be onto something with her favored habit of drinks and dancing with strangers on the weekend. I was having a blast. I also needed to take the edge off of my disappointment. Even though I had passedmostof my trials, I had failed the endurance test for Physical Arcana, which meant that I would have to wait another quarter before I could try and test again. It wasn’t the end of the world, and it had been a long shot, but still. I really wanted to take those damn courses. I was already craving the weight of those aetherblades in my hands.
The buzz was helping, though. As the liquor coated my tongue, I was wrapped up in a more lazy, languid joy, and a sense of belonging. It was reminiscent of the first time Graysen and I had made love in the meadows back home—all slow and heated and heavy, a strange juxtaposition of weighted limbs and a racing heart. Strange, but enjoyable.