I nod, rising to my feet. The conversation seems over, but as I turn toward the door, Dragon calls my name.
“Roman.”
I look back at him.
“When you first joined this club, you told everyone to call you Roman, not Viper. Said Viper was the reason you lost Kayla, and you didn’t want to be that person anymore.”
I shift my weight, uncomfortable with the direction of the conversation. “Yeah?”
Dragon leans back in his chair, studying me. “You won your girl back. Kayla’s forgiven you.” His eyes are intent, challenging. “Isn’t it time you forgave yourself and reclaimed your full identity?”
I take a moment to consider the question. I haven’t been Viper since Kayla left me. I made a conscious choice to shed that name, that identity. It represented everything I’d become that drove her away: the secrecy, the hardness, the loyalty to club over her. But Dragon’s not wrong. Things have changed. I’ve changed. And maybe more importantly, I know now that Kayla loves and accepts who I am, all of me, not just the parts that are easy to love.
“I’ll have to talk that over with Kayla too,” I say finally.
Dragon laughs, a full-throated sound that fills his office. “You do that, brother. You do that.”
* * *
No one throws a party like an MC. Beer flows freely, tables are loaded with food, grills are smoking, and music pounds through the speakers as my brothers and their old ladies celebrate my new position as a club officer. I should be enjoying myself, but all I can think about is what I’m about to do, the question I’m about to ask Kayla.
My eyes find her across the room, standing with Maddie. She’s laughing at something Maddie said, her head tilted back, her entire face lit up with joy. She’s wearing a simple sundress, nothing fancy, but on her it looks perfect. Her light brown hair falls loose around her shoulders, and even from here, I can see how her eyes sparkle.
It wasn’t all that long ago that I wasn’t sure I’d ever see her look at me again, let alone look at me the way she does now, with warmth, with desire, with love. I still wake up some mornings and have to remind myself this is real, that she’s back in my life, in my bed, in my heart where she’s always belonged.
“Jesus Christ, you look like you’re about to throw up,” Demon says, appearing at my side with a beer in hand. “It’s pathetic.”
I shoot him a glare. “Shut up.”
“I mean it,” he continues, undeterred. “I can’t imagine anything more painful than watching you act like a teenage boy about to ask his first crush to prom. Just do it already so we can all stop suffering through your nervous breakdown.”
Before I can tell him where to shove his advice, Dragon appears, cuffing his brother on the back of the head. “Be nice to Viper,” he says, though his mouth twitches with amusement.
“Yes, Daddy,” Demon mutters, causing Dragon to roll his eyes.
I ignore them both, taking a long pull from my beer. My hand is steady, but my insides feel like they’re trying to crawl out of my skin. It’s ridiculous. I’ve faced down rival club members, been outnumbered in drunken brawls, stared down the barrels of guns, but the thought of asking Kayla to be my old lady again has me sweating like… well like a boy about to ask out his first crush.
“Relax,” Dragon says, more gently now. “She’s going to say yes.”
“You don’t know that,” I mutter.
“I do, actually,” he says with a certainty that makes me look at him. “How that woman looks at you? She’s already yours. The cut is just a formality.”
I want to believe him. Part of me does. But there’s still that voice in the back of my head, the one that reminds me how badly I hurt her before. What if she’s not ready for this step? What if she still needs more time, more proof that I’ve changed?
Dragon must see the doubt on my face because he squeezes my shoulder once, hard enough to bring me back to the present.“Time to stop overthinking,” he says, then turns and walks toward the small platform that’s been set up for announcements.
I watch him climb up, my heart suddenly hammering in my chest. This is it.
Dragon raises his hands, and the room gradually quiets. “Listen up,” he calls out, his voice carrying easily over the diminishing noise. “Your new officer has something to say.”
All eyes turn to me. I set down my beer and cross the room, my legs feeling like jelly. As I climb up beside Dragon, I catch Kayla’s eye. She looks curious, maybe a little confused, but not worried. Not yet.
“Kayla,” I call out, my voice rougher than I intended. “Come here.”
She makes her way through the crowd, which parts for her like water. When she reaches the platform, I offer her my hand to help her up. Her fingers are warm in mine, her grip strong.
“What’s going on?” she asks quietly, her eyes searching my face.