“I’m going to use the bathroom,” I tell Dominic. He nods distractedly, already halfway into another conversation with Marcus. Instead of heading toward the restrooms, I glance toward the patio. Through the glass doors I see Sophie standing outside.
Smoking. I step out into the crisp bite of night air. The patio is quiet compared to the restaurant inside, soft city noise hums in the distance. Sophie turns slightly when she notices me and she lifts the cigarette.
“Want one?” she asks casually.
I shake my head. “No thanks.”
She shrugs and takes another drag.
“My husband hated that I smoked,” she says. Smoke drifts slowly into the air as she exhales. “I hated him.” She glances toward me. Then adds calmly, “Dom’s a good guy.” The words land heavier than they should. “Not a lot of good guys out there.”
My breath catches.
“Well,” I say coolly, “Dom’s mine.”
Sophie studies me for a moment. Then she raises her wine glass slightly. “Cheers to that.” She finishes her cigarette and crushes it into the ashtray. “I’m going to run to the bathroom,” she says. “Wait for me here?”
I hesitate.
“Yeah,” I say. “Sure.”
She disappears back inside and I stand there alone on the patio. Her wine glass still sits on the small table beside the ashtray. The faint smell of smoke lingers in the air. My mind races, the question circles my thoughts again and again.
Why Dominic? Out of everyone in the world…
Why him? You know he’s married, you know he belongs to someone else.
So why him?
Why my husband?
Why my life?
I must’ve repeated what I was going to say a thousand times in my head. The words spinning over and over like they were trying to force their way out of my mouth.
Why Dominic?
Why him?
The door opens again and Sophie steps back onto the patio. She pauses when she sees me still standing there. “I’m surprised you waited,” she says.
This is the moment. The question sits right there. I open my mouth.
But instead I hear myself say, “Your hair.”
She blinks. “What?”
“Why did you cut it?” Sophie’s expression tightens slightly.
Her fingers reach for the cigarette pack again. She lights another one slowly and blows the smoke out through her nose. Then shrugs. “Sometimes it’s time for a change,” she says. She flicks ash into the tray. “My old hair started reminding me of things I didn’t want to carry around anymore.” She glances toward me. “Funny how something small like that can feel like cutting off an entire past.”
I open my mouth. The words are finally there. Right at the edge of my lips.
But before I can say them—
“Hey, babe. There you are.”
Dominic’s voice cuts through the moment. I turn. He’s standing in the doorway to the patio, hands in his pockets, scanning the two of us.