My hand moves slowly, carefully, like I’m handling something fragile, and I brush a strand of her strawberry-blonde hair away from her face.
She doesn’t wake.
Good.That gives me time.Time to look at her.Time to take this in.Time to try to imprint this moment to memory.
Her lashes rest against her cheeks, her lips slightly parted, her breathing soft and even.She looks peaceful.Safe.
I swallow, my jaw tightening.
What am I going to do?What do I do now?This thing between us has gone way further than I intended before I worked up the nerve to tell Jem how I really felt about her.I need to tell her the truth.That this isn’t fake, that it never was.Not for me.I knew it the second she walked up to me in that damn grocery store, nervous and determined and beautiful.
And now?Now I’m lying in bed with her after the best night of my life, and all I can think about is how I don’t want this to end.I don’t want her to leave.I don’t want to go back to being alone.I don’t wantanythingif it doesn’t include her.
I drag a hand down my face.
I need to talk to her.I need to tell her because if she walks away from this thinking it was just part of the plan, part of her fake relationship idea, I don’t think I’ll survive.
“Mmm…”
I freeze as she stirs.Her fingers flex against my chest, and she shifts, tilting her head up slightly.Her eyes blink open, sleepy and soft, and she smiles.It hits me like a punch to the gut.
“Hi,” she murmurs.
“Hi,” I say, my voice rough.
She hums, pressing a soft kiss to my chest as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.
I go completely still.
Jesus Christ.
“You’re warm,” she mumbles.
I huff out a quiet laugh, my hand settling on her back.
“You’re naked,” I point out.
She smiles against my skin.“So are you.”
Fair.
We lie there for another minute, neither of us moving, just… being.I could stay like this forever.
“I should get to work,” she says eventually, her voice soft.
The words hit me like a bucket of cold water.Reality is a bitch.
“Yeah,” I say, even though I don’t want to.
Jem sighs, pushing up onto her elbows.The sheet slips, and my brain short-circuits.
Fuck.
She doesn’t even seem to notice as she stretches, her hair falling over her shoulders, her skin flushed from sleep.
I sit up too, dragging a hand through my hair.
“Same,” I say, because if I don’t say something, I’ll pin her back to this bed and never let her leave.