No matter how good the chemistry between Noah and me was, I’ve got to accept the fact thatit’s over and move on to focus on much more important things.
Forget about Noah and how he turns me on.
* * *
I failed.
Of course, my mind went back to everything Noah Miller.
But I also miss Millie, the cat. God, I should’ve brought her with me when he offered. But my pride wouldn’t let me.
So, here I sit slumped on my couch with a glass of red as I reply to the comments on Noah’s fan account. I still haven’t created a post, so I have received some messages on the account regarding it. I don’t have it in me to reply to them.
Instead, I have dedicated all that time to writing. I love love, and I love stories even more. I’ve always been fascinated with the power of words, how they can hold you in their clutches, sway your emotions and make you believe that everyone has someone out there for them.
So, I started writing early on. First, it was poems or short stories for school competitions andliterature class. Then it turned to more, and I started writing for myself. I took literary writing as an extra class while getting my degree to hone my skills.
There are only two things about me that no one knows, not even my family or best friend. I enjoy writing, and I’m the one behind that fan account for Noah that suddenly went viral a couple of years ago.
These two are the best-kept secrets in my life, and I plan to keep them hidden. The fan account, for obvious reasons, and I love writing.
Even though I admit I write, I’m not sure if anyone would even remotely be interested in reading them or if they’re even good. Knowing me, they most probably suck.
I’ve already suffered enough humiliation for changing degrees and gaining weight. I can’t begin to imagine how brutal they would be when they found out I’d love to be an author someday.
So, I do it all in the safe walls of my home.
I’m scrolling through the fan page and stop on a video of Noah spreading his thighs on the ice during warm-up. That’s exactly how he thrusts in bed with his tattooed, thick thigh and round butt.
My phone rings, and the caller ID has me panicking, making me throw the device in the air, only to catch it tumbling. It’s like I fear he would see that I’ve been drooling over his best friend.
Closing the app, I answer his phone. “Hey, big brother!” I greet the second the phone touches my ear.
“Hi…” his voice sounds suspicious. “What have you done? Are you hiding something? Did I call you at a bad time? Why the hell do you sound so cheery? That’s too much, even for you!”
The way he sounds so offended and scared has me rolling my eyes at him, even though he can’t see me.
“Don’t you roll your eyes at me, kid!” he yells over the line.
A grin automatically finds its way to my lips. This is what happens when you spend your childhood with someone. You can read each other like an open book—even when you’re not next to each other.
I can’t exactly tell him that I was ogling his best friend. “I was just checking a bunch of assignments after doing a little work for the year-end event,” I sigh. It’s not exactly a lie.
I was doing that before I got distracted.
Being the sole person responsible for the event is starting to get to me. But if I don’t prove my worth and do a splendid job, then I can kiss my dream job goodbye.
“Oh, honey. I know how much you care about your students. Just let me know if I can help you out in any way, Andie. You know all you have to do is ask. But I know you got this. You’re a rockstar!” Ezra’s comforting words and silent support bring tears to my eyes.
My big brother has always been there for me, helping whenever I needed. His love for me always felt undeserving. But tonight, and after the week I’ve had, I’m too selfish not to lean into it.
“You saying that means the world,” I choke on the last words, hoping he doesn’t hear it.
But of course, he does. “You’re crying!? Why are you crying? I’m coming over right now?”
“What’s wrong?” Kaeli’s concerned voice cackles through the phone. She must hear the panic in his voice.
I sniffle and sit straighter. “Oh, no. You don’t need to, Ezra! I don’t want to bother you!”