Delete the call log. Wipe every trace. Pretend it never happened.That’s the mantra I tell myself as my body moves on autopilot.
I hitdelete, watching the last twenty minutes vanish into the digital void as if they had never existed. The ease of it makes me sick. My hands are slick with sweat from the call. The phone is slippery in my grip when I shove it into my bra. The cold glass of the screen is uncomfortable against my skin, but it’s easy to ignore.
I twist the shower knobs off.
The water sputters and then dies with a final hiss, leaving only the faint, intermittent drip of it dribbling from the showerhead. Silence rushes in around me, making my ears ring. The steam clings to me, hot and suffocating.
When I unlock the door, I inhale deep enough to steady myself, only to freeze in my tracks completely.
Matvey is standing there.
The bathroom light frames him in a terrifying way, casting half his face in shadow, turning his eyes into dark coins behind his glasses. His arms are crossed loosely over his chest, but there’s nothing casual about the way he stands. He’s a wall in human shape.
For a heartbeat, we just stare at each other.
Finally, I force words past my dry throat. “What are you doing standing outside the door while I’m showering?”
His eyes narrow slightly, not enough to be called suspicion, but enough make me want to squirm under the scrutiny. They sweep over me from head to toe in one slow pass. He tilts his head, both corners of his mouth tightening at the same time.
“Your hair isn’t wet,” he says.
Inside me, everything lurches.
Oh, fuck.
The phone against my skin feels like a bomb waiting to detonate. My mind scrambles for an answer that won’t sound too suspiciously like a lie, but my tongue is already getting tangled up, already at a loss for words. For a moment, all I can do is stare at him, watching him study me.
I force myself to swallow.
“I, um… didn’t wash my hair. I just… needed the noise. To think.” The lie feels like barbed wire in my mouth.
His brows pinch slightly. “About what?”
“Everything.”
He stares for another long beat. My fingers twitch at my sides as I desperately try not to flinch.
“Matvey,” I say, softer now. “Can you move? Please?”
For a long moment, he doesn’t. The weight of his suspicion presses against me, suffocating. Then, finally, he steps aside. I slip past him quickly and don’t look back.
The bedroom feels like a sanctuary when I close the door behind me, though I know it isn’t. My hands shake as I retrieve the phone from my bra and slide it back onto thenightstand exactly where I found it. Maksim is still asleep, his body warm beneath the blankets when I slip under them.
My body curls on my side, eyes wide in the dark as I stare at nothing. Every nerve in my body screams that Matvey knows. That he’ll go to Maksim in the morning and spill all of my secrets, and then I’ll be more than screwed.
If he figures out I’m plotting to kill his leader, they’ll take me out first.
I press my face into the pillow and pray… pray that he says nothing, pray that Leo survives long enough for me to follow through with this horrible deed, pray that Maksim never sees the betrayal I’ve committed etched across my face when the trigger is finally pulled.
13
MAKSIM
Morning bleeds in slowly, pale light seeping through thin curtains. I stir awake with the warmth of Ivy pressed close beside me.
Her hand is curled near my chest, the backs of her fingers brushing lightly against my skin. For a moment, I allow myself to stay still, and memorize the quiet rhythm of her breathing beside me. Her hair tickles my arm, the faint scent of her mingling with the ghost of what we did last night.
It’s dangerous how much I want to freeze this point in time. To save it from being corrupted by the outside world. But if we stay here, locked in this small little bubble, our child will never be rescued.