A weird laugh escapes me, a bark of disbelief. “That makes no sense,” I whisper.
He smiles, broken but real. “Yeah. I know. But I’m willing to do it.”
The wind picks up, biting through my coat, yet I don’t care.
I take his hand, and for a moment, the world narrows to just the heat of his skin on mine.
“I’m scared,” I whisper.
He squeezes my hand, gentle. “You don’t have to be.”
But I do. Because I know what I have to do.
I stand, wipe my face, and walk to the end of the dock.
The water is waiting, dark and cold and endless.
I turn to Hunter. He looks terrified, but he trusts me.
“Don’t wait for me,” I say.
He nods, understanding.
Then, without another word, I strip off my coat, sweater, and jeans, and stand in my panties and bra, shivering in the wind. The mist curls around my feet like smoke.
I dive in.
The shock is instant, like a thousand needles stabbing every inch of my body. The water is so cold, my heart stops for a second, then races.
I sink, eyes open, watching the light from the sky turn the water silver and white. For a moment, I feel nothing but pain, and then?—
Memory.
— The car crash. The screech of metal. The phone flying from my hand. The world tilting, spinning, then darkness filling my mouth, my nose. Hands grabbing me, dragging me out. Screams. Heat. Confusion.
— Kissing Hunter outdoors. We were dressed up. The way his mouth lingered on mine, the heat in his hands when he brushed my hair from my face. The touch of his fingers on my breasts, and within my moist folds.
— The first time our eyes met in a sexual way. I don’t remember where, but I remember the flash in those blue eyes, the skin around his eyes tightening with desire.
— The way he studiously avoided me at a different family event, making me feel like I was insignificant and ugly.
I’m crying now, big ugly sobs, but I can’t stop. I feel everything all at once—love, rage, relief, terror.
I surface, gasping, hair plastered to my face.
Hunter is at the edge of the dock, arms out, desperate.
But I don’t need him to save me. Not anymore.
I float on my back, staring at the sky, and I remember everything.
Every single thing.
And it hurts, but it’s also the best feeling in the world.
I swim back to the dock, haul myself up, and collapse next to Hunter, shivering and laughing and crying all at once.
He wraps me in his coat, holds me tight, and I let him.