“I do,” she said from behind her hand as she swallowed her food. “But since I got divorced a few months ago, and given my age, I decided that life's too short to put off having what you want. I wanted dessert first, so I’m having it.”
The shout from earlier flashed through my head, remembering how close that little girl had got to suffocating in the wardrobe she’d hidden in. “I think that’s a decision I could get behind.” She handed me a spoon, and I dug into the other slice, groaning as the sweetness hit my tastebuds. Then something else struck me. “Your hair.”
Helen had really long, dark hair when I'd seen her in the coffee shop the other day, but now it was shoulder length and the most beautiful caramel colour that made her light blue eyes pop. “You changed it for your date?” My brows furrowed. I hated that she thought she had to change herself for a man. I hated that any woman did.
She sucked her spoon clean before shaking her head. “No. My friends are on a mission to give me a glow up. My hair, my clothes, my…” She froze, her cheeks blushing. “Well, basically, they are giving me a life upgrade in every area. Whether I want itor not.” She pointed at her dress that hugged her body perfectly, showing off her curves and the swell of her large breasts. My cock twitched, and I dropped my eyes before I made things weird.
“I know. I’m way too old to be wearing something like this. I don’t—”
“Why do you keep doing that?” I put down my spoon, interrupting her. She twisted her lips, obviously waiting for me to explain. “Keep mentioning your age.”
“Because I’m fifty in six months. I’m old.”
“Shut up,” I fired back, and her eyes widened. “Sorry.” I softened my tone. “But you’re not old. Well, you are if you tell yourself you are, but if you’re telling yourself life is too short not to do things that make you smile, then stop telling yourself you’re old. You’re in your prime, you’re starting a whole new chapter. You should be excited, saying yes to everything and grabbing life with both hands.”
Helen took a large mouthful of wine before setting her glass back down. “It’s a lot. The idea of a whole new chapter when I’ve been living the last one since I was eighteen.”
“It’s scary no matter what age you start again. I think my bench meltdown tonight proves that.”
She let out a soft laugh. “I’d not thought of it like that.” She reached for a slice of pizza.
“So no more doing it. You have to promise me.”
Taking a bite, she chewed slowly before she swallowed. “Fine, but we need to fix what was going on with you tonight. Your house sale fell through?”
I nodded. “Yeap, so I’m stuck in the hotel I can’t seem to sleep in. Working shifts and staying somewhere so noisy is hard. Then, like I said, new job, my first time being in charge, a hard shout even though we got a good result. I went for a runand made it as far as the beach and just sat there.” I paused, remembering how crappy I’d felt. “Frozen.”
Helen reached out and covered my hand, which was resting on the table, with hers. Her skin was soft and warm and I wondered what it would feel like if I turned my palm and wrapped our fingers together. Instead, I said, “It’s late. I should go.”
Helen snapped her hand back like I’d scalded her and her face fell; I hated seeing her look so sad.
“God, sorry. Yes. Of course.”
I frowned. “What are you thinking right now?”
Her eyes widened. “W-what? Nothing. What do you mean?”
“The look on your face. What's wrong?”
“I just… I invited you here. I just touched you. I’m Jasper’s mum. It’s weird. I’ve freaked you out. Sorry.”
I laughed. “I’ll be honest, Helen. Since I saw you tonight, you being Jasper’s mum hasn’t crossed my mind once.”
She chewed her bottom lip, tucking her hair behind her ear, looking innocent as fuck, making my heart pound because this was my oldest friend’s mum and maybe my dick needed to remember that.
“I wasn’t weirded out. That wasn’t why I was leaving. I didn’t want to outstay my welcome and, to be honest, I’m afraid I’ll fall asleep if I stay much longer. I’m always so exhausted at the end of a shift pattern and with the rubbish hotel sleep, it’s even worse.”
Helen nodded. “I get it, but you’ve not outstayed your welcome.” She paused as if she was weighing up her next words. “In fact, I have a spare room. If you want to get a good night’s sleep… if that’s not even weirder.”
“Stop,” I chastised. “We’ll add that to the list of things you’re no longer allowed to say.”
“Fine. But I mean it. There’s a bed there if you’d like to stay. You can have a lie in and catch up on your sleep.”
I thought about it for a moment. Not having to leave her warm, welcoming home, not having to climb into the uncomfortable hotel bed with the over-starched sheets, not being woken up at 6 am with the sounds of doors slamming as people started to go for breakfast.
“That would be amazing. If you don’t mind.”
She stood. “I don’t mind. Let me show you where everything is and you can make yourself at home.”