I nodded because I knew she did, but I just wanted to be around her. “How about we get ice cream, then you can drive me home?”
“Like another date?” she asked quietly so no one walking past could hear.
“I guess. If you’d like to go on another date with me.” I batted my lashes at her, hoping I was coming across as cute and innocent, while my thoughts were anything but.
“I mean, I did have an okay time on the last one, so I guess we could,” she replied with a wink.
I pointed to the ice cream shop down the road and we started walking, my fingers twitching to take hold of her hand. “Do you think we should tell your kids about us?”
Helen stopped, her head snapping to the side. “I-I… why?”
I pursed my lips, regretting the words the minute they had left my mouth, because I knew she’d think it was too soon, and she’d probably be right, but I was obsessed with the woman. “I want to touch you, hold your hand, kiss you in public. I want the whole world to know you’re mine, beautiful.” I didn’t try to lower my voice or hide my words from nosey passers by.
“Jax,” she whisper-hissed. “People might hear you.”
“I don’t care. Let them hear.”
Helen’s face fell. “Actually, I’m going to head home. I’ve got a headache and a sugar rush isn’t going to help. I’ll see you later.” And just like that, she was walking away from me to her car.
I jogged after her, slipping into the passenger seat as she started the engine. It was obvious to see that I was fucking this up and so I decided honesty was the only way.
She drove through town towards the house, her eyes fixed on the road, the rapid rise and fall of her chest showing me how much she was freaking out right now.
“I’ve never done this before,” I said, turning to face her.
“Done what?”
“Dated.”
Helen’s head swung sideways, and the car veered onto the wrong side of the road, making an oncoming vehicle honk their horn. I grabbed the wheel as Helen cursed, returning her attention to getting us home in one piece.
“Jesus, beautiful, are you trying to kill us?”
“Why are you saying things like that? Never dated? Have you seen you?”
“If I talk, do you promise to keep your eyes on the road?”
She glanced over at me.
“Helen.”
“Fine, talk. I’m listening.”
“I’m being honest when I tell you I’ve never dated. I’ve never been with someone for more than a night. I’ve never called them for a second date and I sure as hell haven’t waited outside their place of employment, because I’ve not been able to stop thinking about them all day.”
She looked over at me again.
“Helen, eyes… road.”
She drove for a while in silence, before flicking on the indicator and pulling over to a lookout point that gave a stunning view along the coastline. Turning off the engine, she twisted to face me. “I don’t understand.”
I placed my hand on her thigh. “Don’t understand what?”
Tears filled her eyes. “This.” She pointed between us. “I can’t believe that you… a man like you has never dated, never wanted more than a one-night stand, and suddenly you meet me. Older, overweight, inexperienced, and I’m the person you’re choosing to change all that for. Me.” Her words got faster and more high-pitched as she spoke until she sounded almost hysterical.
I cupped her face, running my thumb over the apple of her cheek. “You, beautiful. Although if you’re mean about yourself like that again, I won’t be happy, but yes, Helen. I want differentthings with you. I want more than I’ve ever wanted before.” A tear escaped the corner of her eye. “Why are you crying?” I asked.
“Because it feels like some sick joke. I’m going to fall for you and then you’re going to see all the reasons this won’t work. Reasons I can see already and I’m going to get my heart broken.”