"Are you working tonight?" Caleb asks as he passes me the black-eyed peas.
"No, I'm actually off for the next two days in a row. Not sure what I'm going to do with myself. It's been a minute. I'm going to enjoy it." I've been go, go, go since Levi and I went undercover to take down the white-tail deer operation. I'm looking forward to a little time where I don't have to be doing anything that has to do with being an officer of the law.
"It'll be so exciting," Molly says out of the blue. "You, sitting on your couch, watching Supernatural for the fiftieth time."
"How do you know it's the fiftieth time?" I give her a smirk.
"Lucky guess." She shrugs.
But I see it. Her green eyes are sparkling as she looks at me. She wants to see me later, wants to spend the free time I have together. It's what I want, too. "Keep making them. You're surprisingly good at it."
She opens her mouth to argue, but then closes it quickly when the front door opens, and another member of the extended Harrison family comes in. Darren is one of my favorite people, Levi and I are trying to convince him to leave the Laurel Springs Police Department, and come over to Fish and Wildlife. He's carrying his daughter.
"Damn, it's cold out there," he says as he sets her down on, and starts helping her take her jacket off. "Sorry we're late. I couldn't get her hair right."
Kels makes a noise in the back of her throat. "Why didn't you call me? Yaya loves to see Nicole. Me and your dad would have stopped by."
When he straightens up, he has a look of exasperation on his face. "I know you would've, but at some point I'm going to have to figure out how to do it myself."
"You are," she concedes. "But you don't have to do it all at once. Nikki can have cute hair while you're learning."
She puts the toddler on her hip, and heads toward the bathroom. "Ruby, is it okay if I borrow a brush?"
Molly stands up. "There's an extra one in my old room, and I have some ponytail holders and probably a couple bobby pins too. Let me help you."
My gaze follows her as she walks out of the kitchen/living room toward her bedroom. I could walk there with my eyes closed. Every single time I'd pass by when I was here with Levi while we'd been teenagers, I'd snuck a look. There was no telling what you might be able to see. Once I caught her in her bra, and that had been spank bank fuel for longer than I care to admit.
Darren sighs as he comes over and sits with us. "I don't know about y'all, but I'm fucking tired."
Most everyone at the table looks at him with sympathy in their gaze. "You're doing great," I tell him, bumping his shoulder with mine. "You're not going to have all the answers right now, and you probably won't have them at all in some cases. Nikki is loved, and that's all that matters."
He swallows so hard I see his Adam's apple bob up and down. "That's what I keep telling myself."
It's been a rough couple of years for him. Marriage, divorce, and now being a single father. He's handling it, but sometimes I worry that he's spreading himself too thin. "I keep telling you to come over to Fish and Wildlife. It's less time and stress than SWAT or the PD." He does both when needed.
"I'm thinking about it," he admits.
That's when I see Molly coming down the hallway with Nikki on her hip, and I'm punched in the gut. What would it look like if she were carrying our baby that way? It's not the first time that thought has stopped me in my tracks, but I find myself thinking more and more about it lately.
She passes Nicole to Levi. "Here, get you some practice for when you're a little older."
The group laughs as they look back and forth between Levi and Magnolia. There's no doubt these two will get married and have kids as soon as they feel like the time is right. She has a seat next to me, and I feel her hot breath on my ear. "I saw that look, Kota. We've not even made it official, be careful that others don't see that look, too."
She's right, neither one of us have decided what we want to do with the relationship between us. At some point we're going to have to either put a label on it or not. Most of the time, we just talk about having fun, and I think that's where we'd be for the duration, but I've found myself thinking of her more often than I probably should be. "That look is mine, and mine only."
Pursing her lips together, she swallows roughly, and sits back in her chair. "Mom, can we get some food? I'm starving."
She's deflecting, and I'm used to it, but it still hurts. And today I ask myself if what we're doing is just for fun, or if I want it to be my future.
Before I would've said it's just for fun. But seeing her with a baby, being with her family, and ringing in the new year? It's got me making plans in my mind that I have no business making.
Is that going to stop me? Fuck no.
It makes me want her even more.
Chapter 4
Molly