"It's not pathetic, it's brave, and also you won't be alone for long if you go to the right place." I glance at the clock on the wall and then back at her. "Have you been to the Lean To?"
She shakes her head.
"It's the best bar in Laurel Springs, and I mean that with full knowledge of the competition. It's not a meat market, it's not the kind of place where some guy is going to corner you and be obnoxious about it. It's a real bar, with good music and decent food and people who are actually there to have a good time." I grab her arm and steer her toward the hallway, because we're both due for a break and if we stand at the nurses station we're going to get pulled into something before we get the chance to eat. "Go on a Friday night. Sit at the bar and order something with bourbon in it and just watch what happens. I guarantee you'll know three people's names before you finish your first drink."
"How do you know that?"
"Because I’ve lived here my entire life." I say it simply, rolling my eyes ruefully. "It was a rite of passage to go in there the night I turned twenty-one. I walked in there by myself, sat at the bar, and by the time I'd finished my second drink I'd made two friends and had been invited to a bonfire. That's how Laurel Springs works when you let it."
She's quiet for a second, and then she nods like she's made a decision. "Okay. Friday."
"Friday," I confirm. "And text me when you get there so I know you went."
"You're not coming?"
"I might already have plans," I say, which is a diplomatic way of saying that Dakota texted me this morning asking about Friday and I have absolutely not said no to whatever he's planning. "But even if I can't make it, you go."
We've made it to the corridor that connects the OB wing to the main building, and we're heading toward the cafeteria when Macie brings it back around our earlier conversation.
"So this person you're kind of seeing," she starts.
"I knew you weren't letting that go."
"I'm not letting that go. What does kind of seeing mean? Either you're seeing someone or you're not."
"It means we haven't had the official conversation yet," I tell her, which is the truest version of where Dakota and I are right now. "We're figuring it out."
"Is he worth figuring out?"
The answer comes immediately and without any effort at all, which tells me everything I need to know. "Yeah. He really is."
Macie smiles at me sideways. "Then figure it out."
We push through the set of double doors that leads into the main corridor and that's when it hits me — the particular organized chaos of the ER, that distinct combination of antiseptic and urgency that you never fully get used to no matter how long you've been in healthcare. We have to cut through the edge of it to get to the Café teria on this route, which I usually don't mind, but today I'm mid-sentence, gesturing with my hands, telling Macie something about the Lean To's house bourbon selection, when I look up and stop walking entirely.
Dakota is standing at the intake desk.
He's in uniform, his jacket still on, and he's talking to one of the intake nurses with his badge reflecting off the lights. He’s gesturing behind him, and that’s when I see it. A man sitting in one of the waiting chairs behind him who looks like he took a fall of some kind, hand wrapped in a makeshift bandage, and I put together quickly enough that this is a call Dakota is finishing up rather than something ongoing.
He hasn't seen me yet.
I have approximately two seconds to decide what I'm doing with my face before that changes, and I don't quite get there in time, because he turns his head in that unhurried way he has, like he's just checking the room, and then his eyes land on me and he goes completely still for just a beat before the corner of his mouth pulls up.
It's not a big smile. It's that quiet one, the one he keeps for people that mean something to him. I've seen that smile aimed at Lucy. I've seen it aimed at Levi. It's a relatively short list, and the fact that I'm on it causes flips in my chest that I'm still not fully prepared for even after all the time we've spent together.
"Hey," he says, crossing toward me. He speaks like he's got all the time in the world for me..
"Hey yourself." I manage to keep my voice level, which is an accomplishment given the way my pulse jumped the second I recognized him. "Rough call?"
"Manageable." He glances at Macie who is staring everywhere but at him. "Sorry, I'm Dakota Keller." He offers his hand.
"Macie Croft." She shakes it. "I've heard a lot about you."
I close my eyes for a half second, wishing the ground would swallow me fucking whole.
"Is that right?" He looks back at me, and now the quiet smile has a little more in it. "Good things, I hope."
"Very," Macie says, with the energy of someone who has just been handed more information than she was expecting and is absolutely relishing that fact.