Frankie makes a pained sound. "A basket on Knox Turner's bike."
Ruby nods solemnly. "A wicker basket."
Candace stares. "He's going to kill you."
"He's going to want to," Ruby corrects.
My mouth twitches. I can already see his face. Jaw tight, eyes sharp, restraint turning dangerous.
Ruby writes under KNOX: BIKE BEDAZZLEMENT—"PRINCESS" plate frame, rhinestone "TURNER" decal, sparkly helmet cover, bell that jingles.
"A bell," Candace says, pinching the bridge of her nose.
"A bell!" Darla bounces.
Maggie taps a finger against her chin. "We leave a note in the basket."
"What should it say?" Ruby asks.
Maggie smiles sweetly. "Ride safe, queen."
Darla wheezes. I laugh again, easier this time.
"Nash." Ruby's mouth curves when she says his name. "We make him a dad," she says, pleased.
Darla jumps in. "Yes! Goat dad."
Ruby's evil smile widens. "A baby shower. For his goat."
Candace's gaze slides to Ruby. "You're flirting."
"I am committing to the bit."
Ruby writes under NASH: GOAT DAD BABY SHOWER—Pastel balloon arch, "IT'S A KID!" banner, gift table (baby bottles, tiny onesies modified for goat), games.
"We do it at the clubhouse so he can't hide," Ruby says. "Wholesome. Ridiculous. Half the room cooing at him as though he's a suburban dad."
"And you," Candace says mildly, "are going to hand him the gift."
Ruby's eyes gleam. "Correct."
I wipe my eyes, and for a second the room feels as though it's the safest place I've been all week.
Ruby caps the marker. "James."
The room shifts. James is safe in a way the others aren't. Steady hands, quiet eyes.
Frankie taps her nails. "We can't be cruel."
Ruby nods. "We're going to be confusing."
"He loves to be the one who knows," Candace says.
"So we make him not know," Maggie says.
"What if we make him think he's going viral?" Darla suggests.
Ruby writes under JAMES: INFLUENCER ARC—Ring light in his chair, "ASK ME ANYTHING" sign, camera (not actually live), comment cards with ridiculous questions, self-help books, sponsor script.