Her eyes were wide with wonder as I climbed back on the bed on all fours, coming to a stop between her legs and pressing the gun into her flat palm.
“Never let me hurt you so much that you see me differently.” I pressed my lips to hers, my eyes still open as I spoke against her mouth. “You’re the only thing with a heartbeat that can stop me, Ayda. You’re the only one who can bring me back. Put that gun to my head if you have to.”
Then I slammed into her, holding my body over hers as I watched her reaction.
Her hand tightened around the gun, even as her back rose from the bed and welcomed me deeper inside. She tightened around me for a second, both of her hands rising to her temples. The gun was dark against her fair hair as she stared past my eyes and found something more.
I held my weight above her, tensing every muscle I had as my jaw ticked and I studied her. When my ass began to move, my dick gliding in and out of her slowly, her body softened beneath me. She was no more able to hide how right we felttogether than I was.
My hips moved, legs tensed, and my arms throbbed as I moved back and forth with a hard, slow rhythm that felt like an awakening.
Ayda shifted beneath me, her heels digging into the mattress, her hips pushing her tighter against me, accepting me deeper with a groan of my name. All it took was one leg to ride up over my hip, and she made her move, flipping us both in one fluid movement before she sank down on my cock. One hand pushed against my chest, the other, still holding the gun, pressed my palm down into bed as she moved over me.
Her rhythm picked up, and our eyes stayed locked.
Fuck, she was a defiant little thing when she wanted to be. It was my favorite thing about her. My eyes drifted down to the way her tits bounced as she rode me, traveling south to where we connected. I inhaled sharply, enjoying the tightness of her mixed with the vision in front of me, and all the fucked-up thoughts that ran through my head, thinking of all the fucked-up ways I could take her. My toes curled, and my legs tensed as I pushed my hips up, matching her stroke for stroke, letting my eyes rise to hers as I brought the gun up.
I held her gaze, and I curled my fingers around hers and the Glock as I pushed it to my head.
“Only you,” I told her in a ragged breath. “Only fucking you, Ayda.”
She just stared at me, her body moving against mine with more purpose. Her breath picked up, and beads of sweat peppered her skin, but her eyes never left mine until she found the strength to drag the gun from my head and my hand, and she pushed it over the side of the bed, her body blanketing mine, my name coming as a lament from her lips.
I grabbed her hips with all the strength I had, every ounce of love I had for this woman bleeding out of my fingertips into her skin—into a desperate need to bring her closer and fuck her harder.
I’d been wrong to think I needed anything but her. The blood, the death, the dirt… the fire… none of it mattered when she was riding my dick, whispering my name, covering me with that safety she always provided so freely. I brought her against me almost brutally, making her bounce harder, our sex becoming louder as I felt those fucking traitor tears coat my eyes.
The wall I’d tried to build, to use as protection, began to crumble. It took nothing for her to push it down.
With my jaw tight, I brought a hand up to her chin and drew her to me. “Marry me,” I whispered roughly. “Soon.”
Her rhythm faltered, her legs buckling as her hand slipped over my chest. Between heavy pants, she met my eyes. “Yesterday.”
“Last week.”
“The moment we open our eyes?” She rocked her hips to reiterate her point, her eyes flashing with need as she tightened around me, her teeth impaling her bottom lip.
My eyes closed, and my neck stretched out, my head pushing against the pillow as a low groan escaped my throat. “I should have fucking married you the first day I met you.”
Ayda’s hands pressed against my abs, her nails curling into my flesh. “Slacker.”
I flipped her immediately, growling and hitching her leg up before I placed a hand on the lowest part of her stomach and started to drive into her. My thumb found her clit, brushing over it and teasing in slow, soft circles until I sawher body ache for it, and I pressed down harder to give her the pressure she needed.
“I love you,” I panted almost violently.
She smirked, pushing her curling toes into the bed to rise and meet my thrusts. “Fuck…”
I did. I fucked her like I’d never fucked her before. I drove into her with my body, and I pushed every sorry, every word I’d refused to speak since Harry’s death, and every moment I’d been away from her back into her. I had a lot to make up for. I owed her more than I was worth. I owed her everything.
“Don’t leave me,” I ground out as I felt myself about to come. “Don’t you fucking leave me, Ayda. I’m back now. I’ll never leave again. I promise you.”
Chapter Eleven
AYDA
Those words,hiswords, bounced off the surface of my skull as Drew drove deeply into me and came. Even as I collapsed against the bed and accepted his weight over mine, they played over and over again in my mind. They became louder and louder until I couldn’t bite my tongue for a second longer.
“I would wait a dozen lifetimes for you, Drew.” I shifted enough to pull my arms free, my hand cupping his cheek, as the other lay pressed against my shoulder.