“It is scary.” I lace my fingers through his. “But you’re worth it.”
He tightens his arm around me and buries his face in my hair. Outside, the city hums. Inside, it’s warm, dark, and quiet. I’m lying in Justin Crawford’s bed wearing his shirt with his arms around me, his heartbeat against my back, and Fishette is trending on every platform, and we are absolutely, completely, wonderfully fucked.
I wouldn’t have it any other way.
30
FISH
Istand in front of my mirror in the navy suit, the silver tie that I’ve chosen to wear to match Collette knotted at my throat, and I think about a woman I’m going to have to pretend doesn’t own my heart tonight. This is going to be our greatest performance, trying to act like I don’t know what she tastes like, or how she feels underneath me, or the sounds that she makes as I fuck her.
The Rose Hotel ballroom is stunning, with twinkling lights everywhere, a massive Christmas tree in the corner, and tables draped in white linen with gold accents. The Mavericks have gone all out this year. I scan the room as we walk in, nodding at the boys, shaking hands with the coaching staff, and grabbing a champagne from a passing waiter.
Then I see her.
Collette is standing near the bar with Jo, wearing a silver dress that makes her look like she’s been dipped in liquid metal. It clings to every curve, catches every light in the room, and she looks like something from another planet. Her hair is down, falling over bare shoulders, and she’s laughing at something Josaid. The sight of her, happy and beautiful and mine, hits me in the chest like a slap shot.
She hasn’t seen me yet, so I take the opportunity to just look. To memorize this moment, the way she stands, confident, one hand on her champagne glass, the other gesturing while she talks. The way every man in this room is stealing glances at her, and she doesn’t notice because she doesn’t care.That’s my girl, fuckers. Mine!
Then she looks up, she must feel me. Her eyes find mine across the ballroom, and I watch them drop to my tie.The silver tie.The tie that matches her dress. Something passes across her face, surprise, then something so soft and raw that it nearly takes my knees out from across the room. She bites her lip. I adjust my tie. And that’s our whole conversation. Across a crowded ballroom, in front of everyone, saying everything without saying a word.
“You’re staring,” Evan says beside me.
“I know.”
“Stop. It’s fucking obvious.”
“I can’t.”
“Her brothers are ten feet away.”
“Fine,” I grumble to my best friend.
I force myself to look away. Pierre and Issy are arriving. Felix and Harper are right behind them. I watch as they greet Collette and Jo, and the joy and love she has when she sees her family. Even though her brothers may be a pain in her ass, she does love them dearly, so going against their wishes in dating me … I guess she thinks I’m worth it.
Dinner isthree courses of torture. I’m at a table with Evan, Sully, Bouch, Nelly, and some of the coaching staff. Collette is three tables over with her family. Every time I glance in her direction, she’s laughing or talking or being effortlessly magnetic, and I have to pretend she’s just a colleague.
“You keep looking over there,” Sully says.
“I’m looking at the dessert table,” I tell him.
“The dessert table is behind you.” His eyes narrow.
“Fine, I’m looking at Pierre and Felix.”
Sully doesn’t buy that. “Looks like you’re looking at Collette.”
I still. “No, I’m not.”
“You’ve looked at her six times since the entrée.”
“You’ve counted.”
Sully shrugs. “I’m guessing whatever happened between the two of you is now fixed?”
“Excuse me?”
“It got awkward there for a while,” Bouch adds.