“I’m trying here, Mars. I don't know what to do to keep her.”
“What do you mean?”
“We’re hooking up and that’s been great, but I want her. All of her. I don’t want to be herpretendboyfriend. I want to be her husband.”
Margot stops in her tracks, and I realize I might’ve come on a little strong there but I don’t even care. Of course, I wouldn’t propose to Dani until we’re well into our relationship, maybe not even until she’s finished her med school and residency but it’s absolutely the plan for the future. If she’ll have me.
“You need to tell her how you feel,” Margot says, continuing to walk. “I’m not sure she understands the depth of your feelings for her.”
“She said that?”
Margot sighs, “I’m not going to be a go-between for you two. She’s telling me things and you’re telling me things but I’m not your messenger. Talk to each other to find out how you each feel.”
She’s right but it’s not easy to hear. She’s not going to betray her best friend’s trust by telling me what she’s saying to her but I’m her brother! Doesn’t that count for something?
We head toward the doors of the cafe, and I hold it open for her to walk through. We are definitely the first customers since according to my phone, it’s only six-thirty in the morning.
Margot orders her iced hazelnut latte, and I get two large coffees for Danika and me. Margot clocks the exchange but doesn’t say anything. Margot also orders a coffee for Sydney and we leave the cafe with a travel tray of four coffees and a bag full of pastries to share.
“Have you talked to Dad recently?”
“I’ve been busy, Mars.”
“So have I, but I still find time to call him.”
“Yeah, well, you didn’t live there and take care of them for the past four years,” I say kind of sharply. I don’t mean to be accusing but I don’t like her insinuating that I need to do more than I’m doing for the family. I’ve done enough.
Having to live in that house with a disabled father and an elderly grandmother is not a walk in the park. I worked my ass off to provide for us and help Margot pay for college. Memaw’s social security helped slightly and dad’s disability checks helped even less but I took everything we could get.
Having to take on such responsibility at a young age wasn’t exactly what I envisioned for my life but of course I did it. I always show up for my family.
Now it’s my turn to be a little selfish.
Dad is set up with a remote job at home and Memaw is living large on the couch with her stories. All is well so I’m going to let myself enjoy it for at least a little while.
“I’m sorry, Arden. You’re right.”
I’m already shaking my head. “Forget it, Mars. It’s fine.”
By the time we get back to the apartment building, we’ve changed the subject various times and we’ve landed on Alex’s favorite type of tie when we finally get to the door. Thank god, because I can barely acknowledge that my little sister has a boyfriend that she lives with, let alone talk about him twenty-four/seven. I’ll leave her to yap about her hunky boyfriend with her friends.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Danika
I’msurprisedthatArdenisn’t in my bed when I wake up but I’m more shocked at how disappointed I find myself feeling. Iamthe only one who made the “no sleepovers” rule so I shouldn’t be shocked that he’s following it but, last night was the first time we hooked up in my bed and I thought he would’ve taken the opportunity to break a rule or two.
But he didn’t.
And that’s fine.
When I leave my room, Sydney is laying on the floor, having already cleaned up all the bedding and sheets, stretching like the fitness maniac she is. There’s no Margot in sight, or Arden for that matter.
“I think they went out early this morning.” Sydney shrugs, releasing her left knee and pulling her right knee up to her chest.
“Went where?”
“No idea. Can you pass me my water bottle?”