“Hey, do you know if Tex has his eye on anyone here?” Dante rubbed his hands together. “He seems different, like he’s seeing someone, but he keeps saying he’s not.”
It was on the tip of my damn tongue.Me, he’s seeing me. I gritted my jaw. Fuck, I couldn’t say it. I wasn’t ready. “Uh, I don’t think so.” Evan saw this coming, the bastard, or he’d jinxed me.
“How often do you two hang out? Tex said you have two study sessions a week, but he seems to really enjoy hanging out with you.” He stepped closer to the counter.
“Yes, we have two study sessions during the week, and if he’s in town, I see him on the weekend.” Slumping my shoulders, I stuffed my hands into the pockets of my jeans. I should just fucking tell him. Dante was gay, and he wasn’t a student here. What could it hurt? I snuck a peek at him.Him. It could hurthim. He was a decent guy, and he was unaware of me and Tex because I was an ass and couldn’t tell him.
He eyed me and tapped his finger on his lips. “And you’re not queer, right?”
“No, I’m…”Fuck, fuck, fuck!I mumbled, “Maybe, uh, questioning.”
“What?” He grabbed my arm, pulling me closer as the line shortened. “Did I hear you right? Is that why you’re open to going to the gay bar tonight?” His eyes twinkled. “You want to see what it’s all about, don’t you?” He barked a laugh and then halted, his gaze laser-focused on me. “Does Tex know?”
I shrugged a shoulder. “Yeah.” I was in it now. Why the hell had I said that? Because Dante should know. It was mean-spirited not to tell him after what he’d admitted. But fuck if I could utter the truth aloud. “We’ve, uh, we’ve discussed it.”
With his eyes narrowing, Dante said, “This explains a lot.” He pulled me closer to the counter as the line moved. “I see how he looks at you. He wants you.” Twisting his lips, he said, “Has he made any moves on you? Because I know Tex, he won’t unless he’s certain. He’s careful like that.”
Oh my God, I was dying inside. How the hell was I supposed to handle this? “Um, no, he hasn’t.” My heart stung. I was such a fucking liar. I had to talk to someone. My therapist? Evan? Evan. “Hey, I need to use the restroom. Can you grab my beer?” I pulled out my wallet and handed him some money.
“Sure. Meet me by the condiment stand over there.” He pointed to it.
“Okay.” Keeping my head down, I tramped toward the restroom sign and then ducked into a hallway right next to it. Dante couldn’t have seen me.
Slipping my phone from my jeans pocket, I called Evan and pressed the phone to my ear.
The phone rang once and clicked. “Hey, dude. The game isn’t over yet, is it?”
As my pulse spiked, I said, “No, but I’m in trouble and I don’t know what to do.” Holy fuck, I had to come out to Dante, didn’t I? Why was it such a goddamned big deal?
“Trouble? Are you okay? Did you get hurt?” He snickered. “Are you in a jail cell for beating up Tex’s ex?”
“No, stop it.” I released a sharp laugh despite myself. “Dante confessed to me he wants Tex back.” I breathed through the squeezing in my chest. “He asked me if Tex is seeing anyone and I admitted to him I was questioning and oh fuck, I have to tell him the truth, don’t I?”
“Jesus, Colton, slow down.” He paused. “This is what I was afraid of, except I figured it would be the gay bar that would force it from you.”
“What do I have to lose if I tell Dante the truth?” I sucked my lower lip between my teeth as I leaned my shoulder against the cool masonry wall.
“That depends. Are you ready for this? What would your therapist say?”
“I don’t know. I’ve only seen him once.” Rolling against the wall, I bumped my forehead against it a few times before straightening and pacing the hallway. “It’s not fair to Dante if I don’t tell him.”
“This isn’t about Dante. It’s about you.” He huffed. “Damn it, Colton. For once, consider what’s best for you.”
“But I don’t know what’s best for me.” Hanging my head, the dirty floor blurred under my feet. How was I such a mess inside? This didn’t make any damned sense. Here I was with a man who was gay, a man who would understand. Well, except that I was in a relationship with the man he wanted…but he’d understand. This shouldn’t be scary as fuck.
“Listen, Colton, obviously you’re still torn over this. For now, let it rest. Then, if it feels like the right time, say something to Dante. At least talk to Tex first and let him know how you’re feeling.”
“But then I’ll have to tell Tex his ex wants him back.” My throat clenched. “What if Tex decides he wants Dante back too?” I’d die. I’d crawl into a hole and die.
“I seriously don’t think that will happen. I saw the way Tex looks at you, the way he dotes on you. Colton, Tex is a man in love. He’s just waiting for you to be ready.”
I stopped pacing the hallway as my breath hitched. Was he right? Evan was smart about this stuff. “You think?”
“Yes, I wouldn’t say it otherwise.” His tone lightened. “Now, calm down, take a breath, and then enjoy the game. Talk about something else with Dante. Shift the topic of conversation if he brings it up again and speak with Tex before you say anything. You don’t have to tell him Dante wants him back. Hell, just tell Tex you’re ready to tell Dante the truth.”
I mulled over his words. My anxiety was making me overthink this. “Yeah, okay. Thanks, Evan.”
“Anytime. Go Devils.” He chuckled. “Let me know how it goes.”