I hold my temples between my thumb and forefinger. “She wasn’t at the bar, and she’s not at the motel, and the rental car’s gone and?—”
“Woah, hold up. You lost your girlfriend and can’t find her in a town with like… only five places people would ever go?”
“Not the time for jokes, dumbass.” I can feel the vein in my forehead pulsing. “So I take it you haven’t seen her?”
“No, I haven’t.” His voice softens. “You want me to help look for her?”
“You still know everyone around here. Just ask around, OK? I’m going to double check The Hatch and with Mom and Dad. Grace said she wasn’t feeling well when she saw her about an hour ago, so maybe could you check the pharmacy and grocery store?” I leave out the part that she might have overheard Slade and me and might have bolted.
“Consider it done,” he says, and I hear the sound of keys jingling through the phone. My heart settles down just a fraction knowing he’s helping.
“And please, don’t tell Sisi or Slade? I don’t want her worrying and I don’t want him butting in.” I start walking back toward the sidewalk to head into town with the phone held to my ear.
“Anything else?”
In the background, I hear the unmistakeable sound of his vintage muscle car starting. As moody and standoffish as Sly can be, I’ve always admired his willingness to act for our family.
“No. If you find anything out, call me. Otherwise I’ll meet you back at the motel. And thanks, Sly.”
He huffs a laugh. “Don’t thank me yet.”
With that, I hang up and continue on my walk back into town. At this hour, the old iron street lamps flicker along Silver Street. Outside of the odd car driving by, the street is quiet leaving my mind filled with the sound of the buzzing lights and my own thoughts.
One thought in particular keeps coming back as I walk through the shadows cast by the street light, each one a reminder that I just wantmy Shadowback.
If she’s sick, I should be there with her and give her everything she needs. If she heard something I wanted to tell her myself, then I owe it to her to explain everything. I should have admitted to her what I already admitted to myself back in Jackson, when Slade showed up, that night at Gloria’s. Inthat moment, I already knew in my heart that I wasn’t going to leave her for Seattle. I should have told her that on the spot and this never would have happened.
A cruel laugh works its way up my chest because this feels like it did just over two years ago. This time though, I’m not going to let her run away until she hears the truth straight from my mouth.
The gratingsound of a metal chair dragging across concrete is the sound of defeat that echos in my ears. Sly sits down in the chair next to me, prompting it to creak under his large frame. I eye it skeptically, but he doesn’t seem too concerned when he sighs and leans back. For the second time tonight, I find myself trying to regroup after an emotional whirlwind. Instead of sitting by our childhood pool like we were only a couple hours ago, we’re now at the motel’s pool under the moonlight.
“So now what?” He asks, running his hand over his short, cropped hair and scratching his beard.
I lean back in the chair and toss my head back, groaning. “I don’t know. Maybe she drove herself to urgent care or maybe she really just went for a drive to clear her head.” My brother hums to himself and I can hear the question in it. “Alright, go ahead and ask, or laugh at me, or whatever it is you’re going to do.”
He chuckles and leans forward, propping his elbows on his knees. “You want to tell me what this is really about?” He flashes me a look that tells me he already knows there’s more to this story than I’ve told him. “Because I don’t know her that well, but most people don’t go on a two or three hour drive to clear their head when their stomach is bothering them.”
I let out a long sigh and keep looking up into the night sky. “When did you become the observant sibling?”
He snorts, but doesn’t say anything. I can feel his gaze on me, imploring me to answer his question. “Fine. Slade and I were talking about me working at the restaurant in Seattle, after you left. I think she overheard part of that conversation. The part I wanted to tell her myself.”
“Woah, wait. You’re moving to Seattle?” I straighten up in my chair to find him looking at me with wide eyes. “I love our brother too and know you can be a masochist when it comes to work, but I didn’t think you were that dumb. And speaking of being dumb, you need to stop coming down here twice a month.”
“I thought you said Dad was pretty much useless in the garage?”
He nods enthusiastically. “Oh, he’s totally useless in the garage, but great at the counter. Either way, Dad and I can handle the garage on our own. We’ve talked about hiring someone ever since Uncle Dan retired—not just to keep up—but to actually get ahead.”
I furrow my brows. “Why did you let me keep coming down all the time then?”
“Maybe we liked letting you stretch out those hero legs of yours and feel like you were part of the family. Or maybe, we just missed you a little.” He winks, and holds his finger and thumb just barely apart in front of his face. “But that’s not important anymore. You’re in love with this girl—she needs to be your priority.”
“You don’t think I know that?” I bark back. “That’s why I was talking with Slade—to come up with a plan where we all win. I just wanted to tell her myself.”
“Tell her what exactly?”
That’s a great question, with so many possible answers. I want to tell her that I’m going to finallystop being Slade’s errand boy. I want to tell her that I get it, that Jackson is her home. I want to tell her that like her, I’m choosing to do this for me.
His deep voice snaps my runaway train of a mind back to the moment. “You know what, don’t answer that. I can already see you spiraling and I want to get back to bed. Now, where did you get that rental car from? The airport?”