‘She did. And notawedding –yourwedding. I’m the best man.’
The world shifts on its axis, giving me vertigo, and I blink several times in a row, trying to right it.
Awedding?Mywedding?
This is coming out of nowhere. Pippa and I haven’t discussed dates or venues or a guest list. I figured we’d get to it at some point, but to spring it on me? Why would she think that was a good idea? Ihatesurprises. Agreeing to thistripwas a huge deal – never mind a destination wedding!
But a more pressing question comes to the fore.
‘How the hell is she organising a wedding in Iceland?’ I ask. ‘She didn’t even know where she was going till she got to the airport this morning.’
‘Apparently, she’s keeping it simple.’
‘Simple? Except for the part that it’s in another country –andthat my family have flown in especially. When are Mum and Dad due to arrive?’
‘Er, they’re not. It’s just us, Pippa’s parents, and Ashley, who’s the bridesmaid.’
That makes sense – like me and Dan, Pippa and her sister, Ashley, are best friends. Then it hits me that I’ve missed the most important detail.
‘Hang on – Mum and Dad aren’t coming?’
‘Nope.’
‘But they’re best friends withPip’sparents. Why weren’t they invited?’
‘Well, you know how Mum feels about last-minute plans,’ he replies. ‘She’d have hated having to scramble to get here on time. Maybe it’s that.’
‘Oh, right. And how did you two manage it?’
‘Pippa called us from Heathrow, then we booked flights for this afternoon. Can’t imagine Mum doing that. Not even with two days’ notice.’
‘No, but even so, they should have been invited. Mum would hit the roof if I got married and she wasn’t even on the guest list. Dad wouldn’t mind so much, butMum…’
‘I know, right?’ he says with a snort. ‘Mount Etna erupting wouldpalein comparison.’
He laughs at his weak joke, but I don’t. Nothing about this is funny.
‘Wait, did you say the wedding’s supposed to be in two days’ time?’
‘Well, it was meant to be tomorrow, but she’s holding off for a day. She’s trying to figure out a way to get you here.’
I laugh again, only this time at Pippa’s blind optimism.
‘Has she developed superpowers or something? Is she going to teleport me to another country with her mind? Because last time I checked, flights were grounded across southern Europe and depending on which way the wind blows –literally– northern Europe could be facing the same problem.’
‘Yep.’
‘So, to recap – you’re there, I’m here, Mum and Dad aren’t even bloody invited, and Pippa’s convinced she can defy the laws of nature and somehow fix this.’
‘That’s sounds about right.’
‘God, this just gets worse and worse,’ I say, each revelation a steamy turd being balanced on top of a giant pile of steamy turds.
‘Sorry, mate. And yeah, Pippa asked me not to say anything, but you’re my best mate and there was no way I was keeping this to myself.’
‘Thanks.’
‘Course.’