“Thereisn’t?” Freyah had never considered the possibility of Senectus being a condition exclusive to her people. She used to think it was something that haunted all of Heldraine. Now that she realized it wasn’t, all she could think was,Why us?
“What are you talking about?” Eldric demanded to know.
Freyah told him everything they knew about the “disease”—which wasn’t much to begin with.
Eldric glanced back at them in shock, his eyes wide. How was it that he hadn’t learned about this in school? It felt like something he should have heard of or come across in a book somewhere. It occurred to him then that this terrible thing was another secret kept from the entire kingdom, except for the miserable people inside those walls.
“Is this why you left? To learn more about this disease?” Eldric was finally putting the pieces together.
Freyah opened her mouth to say more but was interrupted by Alissa’s words. Words she said between clenched teeth. “Stop, Freyah.”
Freyah hadn’t noticed before, but the more she told Eldric about Senectus Subita, the more Alissa tensed. Her fists closed around the cot linen with such intensity her knuckles turned white. Realizing her mistake way too late, Freyah pursed her lips and looked at her friend with guilt.
Eldric stood across from them in the tent. He seemed just as bothered about this as Alissa was but for completely differentreasons. The tension in the air had turned the place several degrees colder.
“Why do you always do this?” he asked, his voice low as he studied her. “Why insist on keeping me in the dark?” He stepped closer to where she lay, the muscles in his jaw clenching. “Have I not proven myself trustworthy when I’ve saved your lives more than once now?” Eldric’s voice came out harsh, struggling to keep it steady. He didn’t want them to notice how hurt he was, but he wasn’t succeeding.
“That’s not the point, Van Myr,” Alissa answered, taking a deep breath to contain the annoyance rising.
“What else are you hiding, Alissa? One moment, it’s the injury in your leg you didn’t tell us about. The other is this ‘disease’ that clearly messes with your head,” he barked, resuming the pacing back and forth. “What’s next? Are you a thief as well? The blessed Queen of Heldraine?”
She ignored him, but the deadpan look on her face was compromised by the flaring of her nostrils and the yell that came next. “You know nothing about me!” The stabbing pain in her leg was just as persistent as the one deep inside her chest.
“Of course I don’t, and that’s the damn point… You never tell me anything!” His tone grew louder as he tried to outmatch hers.
Their eyes met when he approached her again. He leaned down, placing his hand on the chair beside her so that their faces were on the same level. They were so close, she could smell his breath.
Her heart beat faster, whether from the heat of the argument or a different kind, she didn’t know.
Eldric’s eyes never left hers, his scrutiny so deep she suspected he could see all of her—her fears, her dreams, her soul.
His breath was choppy and uneven. “I killedfor you,Alissa. More than once.” He exhaled. “And I would do it again, withouthesitation. Do you not see that?” His voice was lower, rougher than she had ever heard before. But even then, he could not prevent it from breaking when the overwhelming feelings he had been burying deep within himself threatened to surface.
Alissa felt his words hit her strong and sharp like a blade, but she didn’t say anything; she only watched him, her brown eyes blinking away tears.
“You trusted me to take you across the country. Why can’t you trust me with the truth?” Eldric whispered.
The way he looked at her with sorrow brought an unwelcome sting to her throat.
“I’m not your enemy, Alissa. You should know that by now,” he said before stepping away from her.
Alissa followed him with her eyes as he stormed out of the tent, mourning the sudden loss of his green eyes on her and the warmth that emanated from him. Deep inside, she knew he deserved to know the whole truth. She just wasn’t sure she was ready to share it yet.
Freyah silently watched her best friend cry herself to sleep. Her tears were an accumulation of everything: the attack from a few days earlier and her illness, the reason why they found themselves so far away from their home to begin with, how she missed her daughter. But they were also triggered by her feelings toward a certain man, feelings she couldn’t acknowledge, that culminated in her unconsciously pushing him away again and again. Freyah had suspected for a while that the constant provocations between them were a way to hide much deeper feelings. This argument was the proof she had needed to confirm her suspicions.
Freyah decided it was time to intervene. She waited until Alissa’s breath was heavy, as she slept peacefully under the candle lights, and slipped away to find Eldric. She was prepared for a long search through the town to find him but was surprised to find Eldric right outside the tent, sitting on the grass. He held his knees to his chest and looked at the sky, desolate.
“I thought you would be far away by now,” she said, sitting beside him.
“I would, if we weren’t fugitives.” He forced a small, sad smile. “I don’t understand her, Freyah,” he whispered. “Why can’t she just open up?”
Every part of Eldric at that moment betrayed his resentment: the hunched shoulders, the clenched fists, the slight shake of his head. He had done so much to protect them, yet he was still treated with distrust.
It broke Freyah’s heart to see him, a friend, that way.
“She doesn’t do it on purpose, Eldric. It’s just too hard for her to talk about,” Freyah said, resting her hand on his shoulder to comfort him.
“Is that fair, though? To treat me with such suspicion when all I do is help you?”