The laughter dies in my throat.
Don’t ruin it.
“I tried to jump you in ninth grade, and you weren’t having it,” I joke, desperate to keep it light.
“Well, I wasn’t gonna take your virginity when you were fourteen.” His jaw hardens. “My mom had me at fifteen, and I always thought it was fucked up that anyone was messing with her at that age.”
I roll my eyes. “I wasn’t going to get pregnant. I know better. And you were fourteen, too.”
“That’s not the point. You deserve better than to be a statistic of this place. Isn’t that what you’re always saying? That we’re gonna get out and not be statistics just ’cause we’re dirt poor?”
I breathe out hard and turn away so I’m staring at the ceiling.
“It wasn’t about that. I just wanted to get it over with before some other fucking Todd took it...”
His hand wraps around mine, squeezing hard.
I squeeze back. Because Z is my lifeline. Z is family. Z is my center.
“I know,” he says quietly. “I know it all, Harp. Because I knowyoubetter than anyone else ever will or ever could. I know you only fuck guys that don’t mean anything to you. But we’re not fourteen anymore. I’ve been sorta hoping you’d realize that for a while now.”
The heat of his hand suddenly burns. Why is he talking about who I fuck? Yeah, he knows I hook up with Greg and sometimes Emilio lately. None of it’s that serious. I’m never letting a man control my life like Mom does. I tell Z everything, and the guys I hang with know the score, too. My pulse picks up. I just don’t know why Z’s suddenly talking like this?—
“What if we could get outnow?” he asks, his whisper cutting through the silence. “What if I found a way?”
I frown. “You know there’s no way. Not with all of Frank’s connections. He threatened boot camp if you ran again.”
“Yeah, but I found a way where Frank and his freak-ass cop friends can’t touch me.” His eyes light up like he’s just figured out how to beat the final boss. “And we could leavenow.”
I sit up, heart pounding. “What? How?”
He sits up too, still holding my hand like a lifeline.
“If two seventeen-year-olds get married, they’re automatically emancipated.”
The words land like a bomb.
My jaw drops, and my stomach churns. I can’t process what he just said.
“You want to—” I stutter. “Are you—? You want to getmarried?”
He shrugs, eyes darting between me and the floor. “I mean, yeah. Wasn’t that always kind of our plan?”
Was it? Because this is the first I’m hearing about it.
“So you’re asking me tomarryyou?” My voice climbs an octave.
His eyes lock on mine. “Harp, it’s the only way. If you stop and think about it, you’ll see.”
I spring off the bed, hands digging into my hair. “Jesus Christ, Z. You can’t just throw that at a girl!”
“Why not? I thought this was what you wanted!” His voice rises, defensive. “You can get away from fucking Todd. And… I can get away from Frank.”
His voice darkens on Frank’s name, and dread coils in my stomach.
“Did it happen again?”
He shrugs and won’t meet my eyes.