Page 150 of The Rules

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What the hell is wrong with me?

That’s not who I am. I don’t lash out. I don’t snap like some territorial asshole in a frat house pissing contest.

Except apparently I do. More than once around Harper now. What the fuck good are my rules if I can’t control my mouth and I keep hurting her like that?

Because then Harper looked at me like I wassomeone else. Like I’d turned into the worst version of myself right in front of her.

I stand on the porch long after she slams the door, staring at the place where she disappeared.

I want to follow her in immediately and beg for forgiveness, but she just went in there to getawayfrom me. So I resist the impulse, trying to think for once about what Harper would want.

Count the reasons to follow her:

Apologize immediately

Explain what I meant

Make sure she’s okay

Fix this now

Count the reasons to wait:

She needs space

I’ll make it worse

She’s angry at me