So now, to get their relationship back on track, he was love bombing her, as if that could help win back her affection. That’s why he’d sent the flowers. The previous week it had been chocolates. And the week before that it was tickets to a Broadway musical, something she usually loved.
Unfortunately for Ryan, the extra attention was backfiring. Instead of being touched, Dot cringed. She had the six-month itch.
And so far, nothing could scratch it.
Chapter 2
Asudden double knock jolted her out of her office chair, and Dot toppled over her water bottle.
“Daydreaming again?” Ugh, her team’s senior vice president, the SVP. He was always needling her.
“Nope, just thinking!” She jumped up and started mopping up the spill with a tissue. Her voice was usually steady and medium-pitched, but it went an octave higher when she was trying to sound extra cheerful.
“How’s the pitch looking?” he asked.
“It’s coming together.” She feigned confidence with a cheerful smile. “It’ll be ready by tomorrow.”
“Good. Feel free to get them to help.” The SVP jutted his pointy chin toward the cubicles where the new hires were wrapping up and laughing together. Dot felt responsible for making sure they all kept their jobs, and that meant landing this new account. “They’re always chatting and giggling. It’s hard to imagine what we’re paying them to do.”
“Actually, they’ve been a big help. Lots of creativity and enthusiasm,” she said brightly, hoping to convince him they were pulling their weight.
“Well, we’ll see,” he said dismissively. He looked down at his Apple Watch. “Okay, I’m due at the Polo Bar.”
Of course he is, she thought. But said, “Don’t worry, we’ve got this.”
“You better.”
Dot didn’t like the shift in pronouns there. Where was the “we” she thought they’d have as a team? He was the kind of boss who didn’t help with a project but was quick to take credit or pass blame. Sadly, she realized, it was probably how he’d gotten so far so fast.
The SVP turned on his heel and strode to the elevator in his Deerskin Triple-Stitch Zegna sneakers, his black leather man-bag bouncing on his hip.
“What a piece of work,” Dot said to herself.
She had never gotten past how he’d promoted one of her colleagues—a guy he golfed with on weekends at a club in New Jersey that both their parents belonged to—ahead of her, despite the fact she did more work and got better results. That had stung, but she’d swallowed it, fearing that complaining would make it worse for her in the long run. She was hyper-aware about being liked and tried to avoid confrontation. So, she’d just doubled down and worked harder.
When he’d disappeared, Dot sat back down and stared at the screen for a while. She had a couple of ideas that were promises the firm couldn’t guarantee, but that the client would probably appreciate. She added them into the deck and left herself some room to make any additions she might think of first thing in the morning.
She decided to call it a day. As her grandfather who served in the Air Force used to say, she was running out of airspeed and altitude. Better to sign off and clear her mind.
While Dot wasn’t prone to anxiety, she wasn’t sure what was wrong with herself lately. More and more, at twenty-five, she was feeling out of sorts and like she was running behind everyone else. This was despite moving up quickly after joining the firm. She was one of the youngest of the account managers and had a lot of client contact and responsibility.
But she wasn’t excited by her work and dwelled on why she’d been passed over for promotion in her last review. Her boss, the SVP, had just said they wanted to see more. The “more” was left undefined, which left her frustrated and grasping at straws. And regardless, she couldn’t see any real opportunity for advancement at the company in the next two years. And she had ambition to get ahead.
Beyond that, she’d thought at this point there would be more clarity in her life when it came to work and love. But things felt more confusing and harder than ever. This wasn’t how she imagined her life at this age.
Not wanting to dwell on worries, Dot decided to shake all that off at least for a night. She was meeting her girlfriends, Mary and Harper, at her apartment.
They’d been invited to a big conference call about next year’s presidential election and possible volunteer opportunities. And George Clooney was the guest speaker to kick things off, so she had to say yes. Dot had signed them all up and offered to host at her apartment. She didn’t know what the call would be like, but it was a good excuse to get together.
Dot, Mary, and Harper had met their freshman year at NYU in English Lit 101. They were fast friends and had grown close over the years. The name for their yearslong text thread was given to them one late night after an off-campus party by one of the workers at Joe’s Pizza. “Check it out, guys, here comes The Crew.” The nickname stuck and became the title of their group chat.
She needed to get moving to beat them to her house, but before she left the office, Dot had to go through her routine. It was borderline OCD, she realized, but she had her personal clean-desk policy to keep organized.
First, she got her email inbox down to under twenty unread messages. Then she collected her colored pens and highlighters and put them back in her Waverly Diner coffee mug. She gathered the loose papers on her desk and kept only what she really needed. Finally, she separated the trash and recycling, wrote out a fresh to-do list, and reviewed her schedule for the next day.
Satisfied that everything was in order, Dot slipped off her black high heels and put them under her desk next to the nude pair she kept at the office. This saved her closet space at home and from schlepping them back and forth to work. She put on her sneakers and a traditional tan trench coat, belted in front. She pulled a printed silk scarf from her coat pocket and tied it around her neck, Audrey H. style, to ward off the chilly draft whipping through all the Midtown towers.
Before she left, Dot glanced at Ryan’s flowers. She didn’t want to carry them home. She thought about posting a pic on her Instagram story to show everyone what a great boyfriend she had.