“Beatrice,” Algernon implored, his deep voice raw with emotion.
The pain in his voice only added to her own, and she could not take it anymore.
“Let me leave, Algernon,” she said, trying to keep her voice steady despite the tears now trekking down her cheeks. “I have not asked for one thing since you brought me here, so please do this for me now. I need to…” she paused, drawing in another ragged breath as her heart shuddered painfully. “I need to get away from you.”
Pride had made her bold enough to speak her mind sharply, but now, as her heart felt shredded and her head ached with so many thoughts, she felt it slip away as her chin begin to wobble.
“Please,” she pleaded softly then her first sob broke loose.
It was small, stifled quickly by her hand, but still, as it slipped out, Algernon looked at her as if she’d stuck a knife in his chest. Through watery eyes, she watched as his handsome face contorted into a tortured expression. Then he pushed away from the door and took two steps back.
He drew his bottom lip between his teeth as he glanced red-rimmed eyes away from her and nodded. Everything about him was stiff. Every muscle on his glorious body tightened with tension. He did not even appear to breathe.
“I am sorry, Beatrice.”
The four words he released sounded as tortured and unstable as he appeared, and they ripped through Beatrice’s heart. She wanted to make things better.Cravedit even. Yet she knew she could not. To try would be torture for her, for even as he appeared in as much pain as she was, he was not going to change his mind.
Without answering, Beatrice opened the door and fled back to her rooms, each step warning her that her strength to keep everything inside was starting to fade. She let out a ragged sob as she reached her door, and she held her breath, not wanting anything else to come out before she was in the privacy of her room.
Once the door was shut though, she put her back to it and slid down to her bottom as she drew in a deep breath, and a terrible sound of agony left her throat as her trickle of tears turned into a flood.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
Two Days Later
“Go away, please, Mira,” Beatrice called as she heard the gentle knocking at her door. “I told you, I am too ill to eat at present.”
Beatrice pulled her covers back up over her head and nestled under them. She let out an exhausted sigh and shut her aching eyes again. After two days of nearly crying nonstop, the tears had finally dried up. However now, her eyes felt itchy and puffy as did the rest of her face. She did not want to risk being out from under her blankets too long, fearing she’d catch her reflection. She did not have to see that she looked awful. She felt it. From the very tips of her toes to the very ends of each individual strand of hair on her head.Everythingached.
“I am not here to bring you food, Lady Beatrice,” Mira called through the door. “It is Lord Henry Fitzroy. He is here to see you.”
Beatrice’s eyes snapped open again as her stomach tightened. She supposed his visit was inevitable. Algernon had said he had agreed to marry her after all.
From under the covers, she heard her door open, and Mira’s dainty footsteps coming into her room.
“I know you have been feeling ill as of late, Lady Beatrice,” Mira said in a gentle tone as she drew close to Beatrice’s bed, “however Lord Henry seems most insistent to speak with you despite you feeling so poorly. I do not believe he is going to leave unless he sees you.”
Beatrice let out a pained sigh. She supposed she could not hide under her blankets forever. Slowly, she dragged the covers away from her head and looked toward Mira. Her lady’s maid paled and gasped as she saw her.
“Lady Beatrice, what is wrong?” Mira asked, rushing to her side as Beatrice forced herself up into a sitting position.
Beatrice let out a weak laugh.
“Do I look so horrible?” she asked.
Mira didn’t have to answer. Her expression spoke volumes.
Yes. I truly must.
“You should allow Mrs. Sheer to come see you. Or a physician,” Mira insisted.
“No,” Beatrice answered quickly. Neither would be able to help her with her particular ailment. No one could.
“I am…” She was about to say fine but stopped herself. She was not fine. In fact, she was the direct opposite.
“It is nothing that requires such assistance,” she finished after a while. “Tell the Lord I shall be down as soon as possible. And perhaps you could go to the kitchens and see if Alice has some spare ice?”
She’d helped Elspeth and Verity many a times after they’d had one too many cups the night before. They’d wake up with swollen faces and had used ice to relieve the redness and puffiness. Though her condition was not from too much drink, Beatrice hoped such a trick would help her.